Thursday, March 25, 2010

We rob banks. And your will to live.

In terms of television watching, last weekend was insanely disappointing.

It’s nobody’s fault but mine. I’m the idiot who chose the viewing material from the library. I had such high hopes. I must choose my viewing material more wisely from now on.

I’ve been on a serious Bonnie and Clyde kick lately. I’ve always had a thing for the couple, leftover because I adored the Looney Tunes cartoon “Bunny and Clyde” (go figure). I very recently read a phenomenal book, Go Down Together: The True, Untold Story of Bonnie and Clyde, by Jeff Guinn. And this really set me off on a kick. I’ve got three other B&C related books out from the library right now. But I’d never seen the 70’s movie.

I really wish I had left it at just reading materials and not gone the movie route.

So, as someone who reads a lot of books that are later turned into movies, or vice versa, I am used to being disappointed. Very rarely can a movie equal up to a book. It’s a sad truth which literary minded people refuse to understand and always scream about.

Historical inaccuracies are also likely to occur. Several characters are condensed into one person, time spans are smushed to fit more into 120 minutes, etc, etc. It comes with the territory.

But good god in heaven, this movie is so far from historically accurate it may as well be labeled a work of fiction.

Even if you didn’t know anything about the pair prior to watching the movie, what a piece of shit. I would have little to no respect for this pairing if all I had to go on was these two. Nor for the rest of the family. Blanche was a lady who tried to rise above her station, but she wasn’t the shrill FREAK OF NATURE as portrayed here. Buck was the responsible one of the two, not the immature wannabe cowboy as played by Gene Hackman.

The only redeeming quality of this movie is Faye Dunaway. Her performance isn’t so fabulous, but she is undeniably beautiful. I watched Mommy Dearest at a young age and was petrified of her (I couldn’t separate her from Joan Crawford, and I still sometimes have trouble picturing Joan instead of Faye), but I also watched the movie so much I could quote it. (“Tiiinaaaa! Bring me the axe!”)

Faye is breathtaking here. The hair, the clothes, those eyes. I wish she’d worked harder on her Texas accent, though.

Per IMDB, Bob Dylan was the first choice to play Clyde. Good god in heaven, why didn’t he? I’ve never had an imaginary love affair with Warren Beatty, and now I probably never will. His accent made me want to kick puppies it was so awful.

There was zero chemistry between these two. Faye had more chemistry with the Texas Ranger than she did with her romantic co-lead. Ugh.

Watching this was a waste of a perfectly decent evening.

I also watched the second DVD collection of The Twilight Zone.

I was about negative 40 years old when this show originally aired, and it didn’t air on Nick at Nite, so my knowledge of it was limited until just a few years ago. I’d seen the movie (John Lithgow FTW), and enjoyed it, but had only seen clips and heard plot summaries up until the Sci Fi network (Syfy For the loss…) started airing reruns. I caught up on quite a few episodes, but probably nowhere near even a quarter of the episodes that were filmed.

If I went off only the episodes I’ve seen in the two DVD collections I’ve watched so far, I would say The Twilight Zone is severely overrated.

Most of the TZ episodes can be divided into the following (boring) categories:

Wartime (Judgement Night, The purple testament, A quality of mercy, Still valley), Westerns (Mr. Denton on Doomsday, A hundred yards over the rim), and Space (And when the sky was opened, I shot an arrow into the air).

Of all of the episodes in this collection, I liked about a handful. This included Living Doll ("My name's Talking Tina, and I don't think I like you."), The Dummy, The After Hours, The Lateness of the Hour (seeing the ending coming did not lessen the creep factor), What You Need, A Kind of Stopwatch, and The Midnight Sun.

There were a few others that didn't make me regret ever even thinking of getting these DVDs, but those were some of the best.

The all-time best was an episode called "Death Ship" written by Richard Matheson. For those who aren't familiar with that name, he is the author of incredible books such as I Am Legend, Stir of Echoes, and What Dreams May Come. He's also written some of the greatest TZ episodes, including Nightmare at 10,000 Feet.

I wish I didn't hate the majority of these episodes. Why must they all have such DEEP WONDERFUL MEANING? Just scare me and shut up.

To wash the awful taste of these two out of my mouth, I watched the Director's Commentary for Copycat.

I won't go too far into this, because it doesn't really fit my criteria for reviewing. But this is one of my top favorite movies for ass-kicking intensity and suspense.

The cast is drop-dead amazing. Sigourney Weaver is perfection in everything she does, but here, you see something she's never shown before, vulnerability. You truly believe she is terrified to leave this apartment. But when her strength finally comes out and she kicks ass and takes names, it's just beautiful to watch. Her performance is my favorite.

Holly Hunter has never been a top 10 actress for me, mostly because her accent drives me nuts. But she is so strong and so smart in this role, I can't help but root for her. Though the first time I watched the movie I was furious that Reuben died because of her. Speaking of.

Dermot Mulroney is a fairly decent actor. However, here he was mostly filler. He didn't actually contribute much, other than pretty nice eye candy and red herring-esque romantic interest. I was still sad to see him go.

The real stand-out, knock-down star of this, however, is Harry Connick, Jr. As a Louisiana girl, I have a special affinity for the boy, and he doesn't let me down here. He is phenomenal as Darryl Lee Cullum. So effing creepy. According to interviews, he based the character on an actual person he knew growing up. I would like to stand up and say that person is not any member of my immediate family.

I should have just watched Copycat and left out Bonnie and Clyde. Would've been a much more pleasant weekend.

No comments:

Post a Comment