In April, I said I was looking forward to Season 5 of Bones. I also said it would take me a year to watch it.
Good news! It only took me nine months! I’m ahead by three.
I wasn’t spoiled for this season like I was the last. I saw one episode, the barbecued body one, because it was an opener for Dollhouse. It didn’t spoil me for anything other than Arastoo’s actual accent. I didn’t know where the storyline was going with Booth and Brennan, but I had the feeling I wasn’t going to like it, no matter what they did.
The good news is, I didn’t hate it as much as I did Season 4. But that doesn’t mean I was happy.
When it was just sexual tension, this relationship was fine. A little fun in the early seasons, with the subtext and small moments. But all of last season, there was so much emphasis on the relationship between Booth and Brennan (Brooth?) that I got more irritated with each episode.
Flash cut to this season, and me fighting not to throw things at my computer monitor.
It’s not just that Booth thought he was in love with Brennan. That I could handle. But the writers completely destroyed her characterization. In the season premiere, the only way she could have been more out of character was if she jumped on Booth, wrapping her thighs around his stomach and humping him to oblivion. She was flirty, and coy, and that is not Brennan. They managed to tone it down a lot as the episodes went along, but to have someone in every single episode point out the sexual chemistry?
Dear writers: Anvils kill. Look it up.
Now, if you want to discuss a relationship that made me squeal with ‘shippy joy, let’s talk about Angela and Hodgins. During Season 4, I was so upset that they broke the couple up. I saw no logical reason, other than to put Angela in an unnecessary lesbian relationship. Roxy was a bitch.
This season, it was obvious they were slowly moving them into position. And it was subtle. Whoever handled this needs to work on the Booth/Brennan dynamic. I might actually support it if they did.
Everything involving these two was fun. I am dying to know what sex act Hodgins did so well it was put into Brennan’s book. His parting comment about other men copying this move, and how she would never be rid of him, had me grinning so hard. It was so perfect. And as always, any opportunity for Billy Gibbons to make a cameo appearance is good in my book.
We also had a brief reappearance of Zach, in the 100th episode. I missed him so.
The 100th episode was actually a lot of fun. Not only do we get a flashback of how everything started, but we also got to see all the characters with their original looks. That was hilariously bad. I mean, Hodgins hair alone. I remember why I didn’t immediately put him and Angela together now.
The first meeting of Camille and Brennan was also perfect. No politeness, Brennan’s trademark abruptness. Caroline basically smacking Booth around and telling him he would never get her office. Much of it was expected, but still funny. I didn’t even mind that Booth and Brennan shared a kiss and almost shared more. THAT makes sense. That could’ve been inserted in seamlessly, without the heavy-handed hinting in the last two seasons. It actually would’ve been better without it.
The most frustrating part is how unnecessary it all is. This season leads me to believe that the writers think the fans are idiots. Obviously, we’re too slow to pick up on the extreme chemistry between Boreanaz and Deschanel. These two have had intense sexual chemistry from the jump, and everyone could pick that up. That is why fans (other than me) have been screaming for a hookup since Season 1.
I prefer to be teased by a show, not held down and handfed information. I will never be satisfied with a show that doesn’t allow me to think on my own. Let me see the chemistry. Stop telling me it’s there.
Alright, I need to move on. I could bitch about this for three entries in a row.
The intern dance continues. I guess we’re going to keep this going until one of them gets a doctorate? I suppose I don’t mind, but it would be nice to trim the fat. I can’t bond with any of them, because we don’t see them on a regular basis.
I hated Daisy a lot less this season. She stood up for herself against Sweets, and got to geek out with Brennan over the mummy find. And seeing Brennan herself allowed to geek out because Daisy was there pretty much wedged her into my heart.
Wendell was a fun one. He and Angela hooking up made sense, and it was sweet and fun. Him paying what little he could to rescue that adorable piglet made my heart give a little cheer. Once he broke up with Angela, he lost all usefulness, but it was fun while it lasted. I loved the entire scholarship storyline, but again. How does one bond with an intern on a steady rotation? Would they have done that for any of the others?
The guest stars were especially on point this season. We had two Whedonverse alumni, the singer of Buckcherry, plus the return of (Chef) Gordon Gordon. We had Boreanaz’s dad in not one, but two cameos, and we had my newly beloved Zooey Deschanel. She was absolutely perfect as Margaret. She and Brennan were so opposite, but still so alike. Even if Zooey didn’t look exactly like her sister, you would still be able to tell those two shared a genetic code.
To have the season open on a scene with Cyndi Lauper set huge expectations for me all season. You don’t start with her and then fail. And the season really lived up to it. And Robert Englund as the extremely creepy grown-up friend to an adolescent Brennan made so much sense, it would’ve been impossible not to use it.
The body set ups this season were so good. A few of them reminded me of the crazy ways they found bodies on Season 1 of Castle. With shows like this, as much as I realize this is an amazing prop department making it all happen, it still totally grosses me to see them. I eyed my cats very differently after seeing what they can do to a body.
And can we mention the testicle flying out of the giant washing machine? Because I think we all learned a little something there.
This season could’ve been a lot worse. It was an improvement from Season 4, and that makes me happy. I’m hoping this upward mobility continues. The final scene between Brennan and Booth really did tug at my heart strings. If this subtlety had been the theme throughout the season, I would’ve been sobbing, begging for them to just run into each other’s arms and kiss for all they were worth.
There’s always next season.