Bunny's Pop Culture

Yeah? You and whose army?

2011-07-24T21:21:00.006-05:00

Deathly Hallows, Part 2. The end of a fandom era.

Reading Deathly Hollows was a swift blow. Tears and laughter and joy and all the more tears. No more books. But we still had the movies left to enjoy.

And now it’s done. The last movie has been released, and short of locking JK Rowling in a cellar and making her write more (and believe me, we all have ideas), there will be no new Harry Potter.

It’s sad. And it may explain why I cried more during this movie than I have at some funerals I’ve attended.

Many people, including TBF’s hubs, have said they were disappointed by the film. They expected more. I am rewatching the film as I write this (which accounts for the horrendous cam-quality pictures I’ll be interspersing throughout the entry), but I cannot see anything in this film that would cause me to be grossly disappointed in it. The bits that were left out were for obvious reasons, and what I was annoyed about most pales in comparison to what I loved.

So, let’s begin.

There were so many wonderful small bits of humor in this movie. So many times to giggle. And yet I bawled my eyes out almost from the start.

It should come as a surprise to no one that I was dreadfully upset by the dragon chained up under Gringott’s. From our first glimpse, I was upset. The chains digging into the bloody skin, the fear when the clackers started. When Hermione said, “That’s barbaric”, I couldn’t hold in my glee. That’s my girl.

As the dragon fought to fly again, slamming into buildings, and we got a shot of the torn wings as he finally took flight, it was such a beautiful visual. As much as I wish this scene had gone into the first movie, it was such an incredible start to the film. Including my love Helena Bonham Carter’s portrayal of Hermione-as-Bellatrix. That was a real treat. Between falling over in her boots, and her fearful orders to the goblins, it was just awesome.

The beginning of the movie feels off. I think this plays into my belief that part 1 felt like filler, rather than a whole movie. As I thought about the movie the next day, I realized with a laugh that if they cut out the only bits of the book I hated, which is all the damn walking through the forest, they could’ve fitted the Gringott’s scene nicely into movie one, and then DH2 would be complete Hogwarts battle, plus the Dumbledore back story that got the shaft.

There’s an insufferable, unnecessary loose end in the movie. We meet Aberforth, a man who hasn’t been mentioned in the movies, and who does bear a nice enough resemblance to Albus to show that he’s a Dumbledore. They do a rapid explanation of the mirror¹, and we find Aberforth is a bitter man, angry at Dumbledore, and willing to toss him merrily under the bus and tell us that he caused the death of their Arriana.

That’s perfectly okay, because we² know it’s going to be cleared up. No problem. Except…

King’s Cross scene. Well played by both, dying Horcrux suitably creepy. And not one mention of Grindwald, Arriana, or the asshole muggles. The scene ends, and I want to throw something at the screen. Where’s the talk? Where’s Dumbledore crying? Where’s the closure? Goddamit, movie makers.

The only time the HP movies have pissed me off is when, in my opinion, the stupid viewer³ misses something crucial. The exclusion of Dobby in the last four movies, the exclusion of Sirius in Goblet of Fire, everything about Prisoner of Azkaban. Crucial plot is left out, and necessary details are missed.

This movie shit on Dumbledore, and then didn’t bother wiping it away. The reader spends the majority of Book 7 having kittens because, apparently, Dumbledore wasn’t a solid citizen. But we get to the King’s Cross scene, and goddamit, all is well.

If it was just that they left out the Grindewald part, this wouldn’t have been so bad. But between the Arianna mention, and then in Snape’s memory, the conversation about saving Harry to have him die when it is needed. This isn’t cleared up at the end of the movie, and Dumbledore looks more like a villain than Snape ever did.

RIP Amy Winehouse

2011-07-23T13:47:00.002-05:00

All I can ever be to you,
Is a darkness that we knew,
And this regret I've got accustomed to,
Once it was so right,
When we were at our high,
Waiting for you in the hotel at night,
I knew I hadn't met my match,
But every moment we could snatch,
I don't know why I got so attached,
It's my responsibility,
And you don't owe nothing to me,
But to walk away I have no capacity

He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I'm grown,
And there's no way, in this blue shape,
My tears dry on their own,

I don't understand,
Why do I stress a man,
When there's so many bigger things at hand,
We could a never had it all,
We had to hit a wall,
So this is inevitable withdrawal,
Even if I stop wanting you,
A perspective pushes true,
I'll be some next man's other woman soon,

I shouldn't play myself again,
I should just be my own best friend,
Not fuck myself in the head with stupid men,

So we are history,
Your shadow covers me
The sky above,
A blaze only that lovers see

I wish I could say no regrets,
And no emotional debts,
Cause as we kiss goodbye the sun sets
So we are history,
The shadow covers me,
The sky above a blaze that only lovers see,

He walks away,
The sun goes down,
He takes the day but I'm grown,
And in no way,
In my deep shape
My tears dry

RIP Amy Winehouse. You were too talented and too smart. I looked forward to your next album, and I'm horribly sad I'll never hear a new song by you.

Pre-Potter

2011-07-19T10:02:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I worked early at the boring job so I could see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in the evening with TBF, her hubs, and a friend of ours from high school (who should have a better title, but that’s what he gets).

This was me before, at work all day:

This was me during and after:

If there’s one thing you should know about me, I take my time on blog entries, so the Deathly Hallows entry isn’t done cooking yet.

I do, however, have thoughts on the trailers pre-Potter.

The Dark Knight Rises.

Yeah. No. I’ll watch the real Batman, thanks.

Cowboys and Aliens.

Um. Right. Save your money. Here you go.

Have a real Sci-Fi western.

The trailer for Captain America looks pretty good, I must admit. I’m not a comic buff, but I could see renting the movie and watching it.

Though this may have more to do with Chris Evans’ man boobs.

Mm-hmm.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows

YES YES YES OH GOD YES MORE RIGHT. THERE. BABY.

I did not, it should be noted, make this noise in the theater.

Birthday Girl (Writer)

2011-07-14T11:40:00.001-05:00

If Joss Whedon is the King of TV Writing, Jane Espenson is the Queen.

Sharp and witty, with such deep heart and sincerity, her writing is always deeply felt, and can pull the heart strings and punch the tear ducts.

Jane has had her fingers in so many scripts from my favorite shows. Anytime she’s involved in something, I sit up straighter, because I know she’s going to give me beauty.

Most importantly, it’s thanks to her Twitter Writing Sprints that most of my blog entries get written. Yes, blame Jane Espenson.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer Episode 5x12 - Checkpoint

“I’m fairly certain I said no interruptions.”

Buffy the Vampire Slayer Episode 3x18 - Earshot

“My life happens to, on occasion, suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it's not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they're too busy with their own. The beautiful ones. The popular ones. The guys that pick on you. Everyone. If you could hear what they were feeling. The loneliness. The confusion. It looks quiet down there. It's not. It's deafening.”

Buffy the Vampire Slayer Episode 3x06 - Band Candy

“Oooh... Copper's got a gun.”

And my newest fandom, which I got into solely so that I could watch Caprica, a show helmed by the lady herself.

Battlestar Galactica Episode 3x10 - The Passage

“What you did was harder than facing a bullet. And you did it without putting one other soul in harm's way. Don't know if I could've done that. I wish there something more that I could give you.”

Forcing myself to stop with just these. See her IMBD page for all of my other favorites. Seriously.

We love you, Jane. Have an amazing birthday.

Bloglet: Traumatizing Childhood Movies

2011-07-02T20:38:00.010-05:00

I thoroughly enjoy watching movies from my childhood.

I was an 80’s kid, and I lapped up all of the great 80’s movies. Including ones I never should’ve watched at that age (Sixteen Candles, anyone?)

There are some truly traumatizing children’s movies. I mean, have you seen Old Yeller? Bambi? Even E.T., with it’s cute short little alien with the extendable neck. Go re-watch the scene where he’s white and dying. Last time I managed to make it to that part, I was sobbing so hard I was hyperventilating. That was in my 20’s.

But the most traumatizing movie scene is one that is very rarely mentioned when you talk about upsetting movies. And it shocks me, because I was so upset by it as a child. It broke my then-fully-intact heart.

The Red Shoe - Who Framed Roger Rabbit

I don’t believe any one scene from a supposedly children’s movie has ever upset me as much as this scene did. And I am a soft-hearted freak. I ran over a rat the other night and was in near hysterics.

First of all, shoes come in pairs. They’re partners. Friends. Compatriots. Lovers.

(Don’t think of your shoes being lovers, it’ll freak you out.)

So, this poor little shoe’s partner? Is now alone. What’s that shoe going to do? It can’t find a new partner, all the other shoes are already paired! Plus those sassy purple heeled boots look like bitches.

Find a cartoon with a peg leg, who only needs one shoe? Well, yes, he could do that, but all his life, he would feel the emptiness of his missing partner.

Did you see the eyes on that shoe as he was put into the dip? Ignore the cartoon open mouthed screen. Look at the third screenshot. That is a broken shoe. That looks painful. And he screams.

Seriously, I think of this scene and it upsets me, and I really love this movie.

This is, by far, the most traumatizing moment from a children’s movie. Ever.

I don't make suggestions. If I want to toss a baby out an airlock, I'd say so.

2011-06-26T13:17:00.005-05:00

In May of last year, I wrote an entry about how much I loved Season 1 of Battlestar Galactica. How the ending was so incredible, and had definitely sucked me in, and snagged me for Season 2.

Promptly after the entry, I popped in Season 2, and watched hungrily. I was ready for more Cylons, more Starbuck and Six, what was going to happen to Adama, and Sharon’s baby. I was READY.

And I watched it. And thrilled. And tweeted, and screeched, and gasped, and cried. My friend Joey gave me the entire series on DVD, mostly because he got a set free, but also because he rocks.

And then nothing happened for over a year. I became distracted by other TV shows, other movies, other life. The DVDs stared at me, accusingly. Jamie Bamber started on Law and Order: UK, and I had constant reminders of how great the show was, and how much I was not watching it.

So, out of nowhere a couple of weeks back, I decided it was time to jump back in, feet first. I set up with my work phone and knitting, and was determined to finish a Season 2 rewatch, in preparation for Season 3.

Took over a week, then even longer to finish this entry. But wheeeeeeeee, BSG.

I reviewed my entry from before, and was highly amused. A few points I was planning on mentioning in this entry were already there. Most especially that Crashdown looks exactly like a young Henry Rollins.

My opinion of all of the characters is pretty much exactly the same. Starbuck is most definitely still my favorite, and she got all of the best storylines this season. Not only was she a complete BAMF, she actually got to show vulnerability, and fear, and outright pain.

The Farm storyline was horrifying. Going through the screenshots for it wigged me out. It’s a horrible thought that would make sense in this world, and I am beyond intrigued to know what they did with that second surgery.

One of the things I complained about last season was that there was never enough focus on the background characters. They definitely took care of that this season. I absolutely loved Dualla. Her storylines were great this season, and the actress who plays her is just lovely. Even during her small moments, the emotion is just resonating from those gorgeous eyes of hers. I was sad that she broke up with Billy, but the introduction of her storyline with Apollo was well done. I look forward to seeing how they break up, because I know that’s going to happen.

When I re-read my Season 1 entry, I saw my complaints about the pushing of Apollo and Starbuck together. I’m still of the opinion that their sexual tension is better unrequited, but I have to admit I didn’t mind as much this season. I don’t want them together, but seeing it played out was amazing. Between the kiss when they first saw each other again, and then the damaged almost-sex, it was so well done. I think what helps is that this season really fleshed both of them out more, and I got to see more of their personalities.

I do repeat, though. I don’t want them together.

In Season 1, they got me really good with the shooting of Adama. There’s no other way to say it. Shock and awe and horror. But each time they replayed it this season, it horrified me more and more. This is more about the amazing acting of Edward James Olmos than anything else. The scene is played as a proud man congratulating his crew, and not seeing the gun coming at all. My heart broke every time they replayed the scene, because he looks joyful and proud. He had real affection for Sharon, and she shot him. You see this throughout Season 2, his torn feelings about her being a Cylon. When he wept beside her body, I teared up. When he had his hands around her throat, you felt every ounce of emotion.

And when she said, “And you ask ‘Why’”, my blood ran cold. It was chilling and creepy and perfect.

The storylines were really good this season, though a few episodes let me down. I was absolutely fascinated by the Sharon storyline. Even before “Downloaded”, which is my favorite episode of the season, it gave us a real view of the Cylons. Her turncoat manner was fascinating, though it seemed obvious (to me?) that she was focused solely on protecting her baby. Even her affection for Helo struck me as disingenuous. The moment the baby was “dead”, he meant nothing to her. Knowing how awful the Cylons and Centurians are, I understand the Cylon hate, but it was awful when they told her the baby was going to be killed. Her reaction in her cell, slamming her head into the glass and screaming, completely sucked me in. I am beyond fascinated to see how the storyline involving the baby plays out.

I can’t help but be fascinated by the human Cylons. Hulons. Cymans. Whichever. So having an episode actually about them, from their perspective, was amazing. I love the idea of Baltar haunting Six the way she haunts him. It’s amazing that they aren’t carbon copies of each other, and that they retain mannerisms that were part of them before they “died”.

Based on Six and Sharon’s conversation at the end of the episode, I did not in any way see the end of the season coming. Seriously? Did anyone?

The appearance of Gina was amazing. As incredible as Tricia Helfer is as Six, the extreme difference between the two identical cylons is wonderful. This really shows she is more than just a sexy seductress. She’s a very real actress, and I want to see other things she’s been in.

I still don’t get her role in the final moments. She blew up Cloud 9, which drew the attention of the Cylons and brought them to New Caprica one year later. Now, that seems like a normal Cylon kamikaze mission. But why? It took them the full year to get back from their home planet, but they had “decided” to leave the fleet alone. So…why would…I’m so freakin’ confused by this.

I absolutely loved the Starbuck/Anders storyline. I don’t think this is going to make it through even half of Season 3, especially considering the pneumonia. But the relationship between the two of them was sweet, and fun. The Pyramid game was hot and spicy, and I love stuff like that. It’s similar to my affection for the training scene between Dualla and Lee.

When she had to return without him, and we saw her slow collapse, especially in “Scar”, it was intense and painful, and Katee Sackhoff broke my heart about 100 times over. Just incredible. The reunion was also tear-worthy, but for all the right reasons. I’m going to hate whatever ends up happening to him, I feel it coming.

As much as I like Lady President, there was an awful lot of not liking her this season. I don’t much like that, though, because she’s a BAMF, and deserves her props. Maybe it’s just that her storylines were boring to me. The search for Earth didn’t do much for me, and in no way did I believe she was going to die from cancer. That was an amazing twist, though.

It was a shock for me to realize she knew about the cheating scandal. I truly thought this was going on behind her back. But I love that she would’ve let it lie, and would’ve taken the victory. And that Adama was the reason she didn’t.

It took me a criminally long time to write this entry. I refused to start Season 3 until I finished this blog entry, because I didn’t want my thoughts cheated by knowing what’s to come.

I’ve been spoiled for one of the Cylons, thanks to the New Orleans Comic Con. I walked into a panel, during the fan Q&A portion, and though the fan at the mic did give a spoiler warning, I didn’t run out of the room fast enough. I don’t know where it’s revealed, though, so hopefully I still get a bit of a surprise.

And as with the last entry, here are some images of my favorite moments. Easier than trying to describe each scene that I loved.

View Full Album

I worship at the Whedon Altar

2011-06-23T09:27:00.001-05:00

I’m not the kind of person who would celebrate a celebrity’s birthday as though they were someone I actually know. Wish them happy birthday on Twitter, yes. Acknowledge it publicly and personally, and do a little happy dance that they’re still in the world, and were born at all?

Pfft. That would never happen.

::cough::

Today is Joss Whedon’s 47th birthday. And I can’t think of a better person to get their own birthday blog entry.

Technically, I have been a Joss Whedon fan since I was 7 years old. I watched Roseanne religiously as a child, and he wrote for that show. Even before that, I watched the old school Captain Kangaroo, and you couldn’t tear me away from The Golden Girls. And that was his father. Not to mention? As a Nick at Nite child, I was a huge fan of The Donna Reed Show, and The Dick Van Dyke show. Guess who wrote on those? His grandfather.

Love for Joss Whedon is in my blood, and I didn’t know it on a random day in 1997 when I flipped through TV channels and saw John Ritter on my screen. I stopped to see what it was. Hmm. Robot. That’s odd. Oof, he just went flying down the stairs. Wow. And I changed the channel.

It wasn’t until Season 3 that I started watching the show, and I think it was more the sexy brooding guy and extremely sexy bad girl that got me coming back. But there was no denying this show had something special. And it was all thanks to the man behind the Grrr, Argh.

My love for the show grew with each episode. By 1999, I was an internet junkie, and I devoured every bit of information I could about the show, and its creator. By 2001, I had found a board on AOL to discuss the show with other fanatics, and it was really only then that I learned who Joss Whedon was, and got to discuss how amazing the writing and actors and everything was.

I didn’t watch Firefly at first. It was more a technical error than anything else. I set the season premiere of Buffy and the series premiere of Firefly to record that day, and neither came ended up recording. (Anyone remember VCRs?) Naturally it didn’t stop me from watching the Buffy, but I let Firefly fall by the wayside. It wasn’t until 2005 that I finally watched the entire series, and nearly cried from losing such greatness. After the pain of losing Dollhouse, I’m actually glad I wasn’t there for the original loss of Firefly.

RyAn is a much braver person than I, and he listed his top 10 favorite Whedonverse characters. This will not happen, as my brain is perfectly content not exploding. I will say that in the Whedon realm, nothing tops Buffy for me. It was the first, it was the best. Despite what happened when Marti Noxon took the helm.

With one glaring exception that RyAn will be quick to point out, I will and have watched everything Joss Whedon is involved in. Like many obsessive fans, he can essentially do no wrong in my eyes. I am not a comic book fan, but I will watch The Avengers, and I am genuinely looking forward to it.

Happy birthday, Numfar. Thank you for being you.

I’m right on top of that, Rose

2011-06-08T00:39:00.003-05:00

Dammit, RyAn.

So, ~~today~~ yesterday was the 20th anniversary of Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead. One of the greatest comedies of all time, with a cast that, with two exceptions, has slunk into blissful oblivion, yet will always, in my mind, be associated with this movie that I loved and cherished and was just thinking about last night as I was trying to go to sleep and ignore the cat pouncing on my head.

And RyAn chooses MIDNIGHT to inform me of this knowledge.

RyAn is a fucker. But I love him. And of course, he takes the only real promo image available, so I’m stuck with a watermarked title image. Really, love him.

I remember exactly where I was the first time I watched this movie. It was almost immediately after my parents’ divorce, and my mother, sister, and I were living in our first place away from Psycho Puppy Killer. We watched this movie, and I nearly peed myself laughing. As I grew older ('Cause I was 8?), and kept watching, I’d catch things I’d missed, and find it even more hilarious.

I loved Sue Ellen. And as a child of the late 80’s-early 90’s, thought she was so stylish.

Commence mockery in 5…4…3…2…

But apart from the horrendous fashion in the movie, this is truly a classic. I have bonded repeatedly with people over this. This is a movie where, if I bust out a quote in a random situation, and no one gets it? I know I am surrounded by idiots.

Walking through a grocery store with my friend Ashlie.

“Every girl over 25 needs a cucumber in the house.”

She got it.

Working at the horrible cable company, stressed out of my mind, and I get asked a question.

“I’m right on top of that, Rose!”

Peals of laughter. It became the new office catch phrase. We wrote it all over the office.

And of course, the classic line that can never be overused.

“The dishes are done, man.”

Whatever happened to these people? With the exception of Christina Applegate and David Duchovny, they have all been relegated to “Hey It’s That Guy” status. Which, to be frank, is sad and appalling.

(WARNING. That link goes to TV Tropes. Unless you have an extremely strong willpower, or 8 hours to spend on the internet, don’t click it)

I can never see this movie enough. And I wish someone had told me earlier that I should’ve watched it to celebrate today.

If I owned it on DVD. Which I just realize I don’t. Damn.

Notoriety for whatever reason, never seems to benefit the noted, only the notees

2011-06-04T23:08:00.003-05:00

The first time I saw the trailer for Easy A, I knew I was going to love it. No, really. If you go back through my Twitter feed to last year at some indeterminable time, you’ll find my tweet. It was even responded to.

I say this not in the Hipster, “Oh, I liked that waaay before it was mainstream” way. I say it because this movie was released in September of 2010 and I took my precious damned time in watching it.

I begged people to see it at the theater with me. (Yes, I am one of those people) I got it from the library twice. I returned it, put it back on hold, and felt like an overwhelming failure.

But HA HA, I finally watched it. Suck on that, Hipsters!

I relate in absolutely no way to this movie. That is for one reason, which can be summed up in one word: "Discretion”. Also, I lucked out in that cell phone popularity was still a year or two away, and mass texting was several years away. Seriously dodged a bullet on those fronts.

But this is a ridiculously fun movie. This is fun in the greatest Mean Girls sense of the word. The addition of Patricia Clarkson and removal of Lindsay Lohan could potentially push it ahead on the list. No, wait, there’s apparently a Twilight actor in here. Okay, it may not beat it, but it could definitely tie.

The humor is quick and sharp, my favorite kind. The humor is not visual, it’s all in delivery, and that is my kind of movie. Plus Olive is ridonculously smart, so everything out of her mouth, whether biting or sincere, is a real treat.

Let’s get my new found adoration for Emma Stone out of the way right away. Because holy crap.

I have never seen anything Emma Stone has been in. To be fair, I’ve reviewed the movies and television projects she’s been in, and she was pretty much in one suckfest after another for a very long time. I mean, Marmaduke? And she was in Nathan Fillion’s craptastic Drive, which just tells you everything you need to assume about her acting career.

She is a tiny little redheaded gem in this movie. Everything she does is utterly believable, from the monologue about seafood as an aphrodisiac to bouncing up and down on the bed with the poor little closeted boy. I truly believe she is Olive, and that she is the great defender of the underdog. If I were in high school with her, I…would’ve believed the rumors and considered her a big whore bag. BUT! I would’ve had mad respect for her hot ass corsets.

The cast was all well chosen, especially the adult characters, but I really have nothing to say about almost any of them on an individual basis. Stanley Tucci is always a treasure, Patricia Clarkson could turn Angela’s Ashes into a laugh riot, and Thomas Hayden Church and Lisa Kudrow? Do I need to elaborate?

I do not worship at the Gossip Girl altar. I have seen more than a handful, less than a dozen episodes, almost all of them with Michelle Trachtenberg in them. I really dislike the show. Most especially for the main actress, Blake “Please don’t mind the mouthful of spit I keep in my mouth while delivering my lines” Lively, but also for the contrived plot lines and idiotically spoiled children who comprise a cast I think I’m supposed to feel for.

Little did I know that Penn Badgley is actually a decent actor. I never would’ve figured that out based on his pointless role on GG. He is lovely in this movie as Lobster Todd, and I was immediately drawn to his character. And I rooted hardcore for him. He was the biggest surprise for me, and I enjoyed it.

Amanda Bynes made it big just as I was out of the Nickelodeon phase of my life. But she was on All That when I was transitioning, followed up by the joy that was What I Like About You. Her movies have never made me do cartwheels of glee in anticipation of them. I watched Sydney White because Danny Strong was in it, and though I did enjoy it, it had less to do with her than with the entire cast as a whole.

This is a very different role for her, and it’s perfect. She reminds me of Reese Witherspoon for some reason, maybe because Reese has never been afraid to play the really really different rolls, like Tracy Flick. She’s not a one note character, which she could’ve been, and she’s sassy. I would have hated her character in high school. I did hate the male equivalent of her, and spent a great portion of time doing things I knew would offend him. Funny stories for a different blog.

It doesn’t take much to make me want to rewatch the 80’s movies of my childhood, but this movie seriously kicked in a nostalgia desire. Most especially to watch the Molly Ringwald-era John Hughes movies. The respect paid to those movies really made this movie worthwhile for me. Gotta love pop culture that pays its dues to the ones that came before.

The performance scene was so completely over the top and unbelievable that there was no way it wasn’t going to work. And the groundwork had already been laid for it throughout the movie. And also, did I mention the corsets? The final speech via webcam was also perfect, including the iPod boombox, lawnmower ride, and fist pump.

Just a truly joyful movie. Makes me wish I’d been less discreet in my time.

This was not the only movie I’ve watched in the last week. Let’s do a quick run down.

Rewatch: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows pt 1: Still amazing. Though I’ve been seriously depressed over a lost (now found) pet, so Dobby’s death scene seriously ripped my heart several new holes.

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil: Never saw it before. What a weird ass movie. Kevin Spacey and John Cusack were, as always, a joy. Suppose I need to read the book.

It: Watched with commentary only. I watched this for the first time when I was six years old. Not kidding. Still traumatized. The commentary featured all of the adult cast plus the director. It was jarring to hear John Ritter’s voice, talking about how someday he’d watch the movie with his children. Very sad.

Diabolique: The original French version with subtitles. I saw the remake when it first came out (rented, on video, I am old), and was not impressed. The original holds that proper tension, and the bathtub scene was creepy the way it’s supposed to be, not in that ridiculous way it was handled in the Sharon Stone version. Which, in fact, I am rewatching right now. It’s as ridiculous as I remembered.

I miss watching movies. But I recently acquired a treadmill, so I should be getting back into the habit, and actually bloggin’ away more often now.

If the lion knows its own strength, no man could control it

2011-05-01T16:42:00.008-05:00

In honor of the sweetness that was the wedding of William and Kate, it is only fitting that I finally post my thoughts on The Tudors.

My love for all things from the Tudor dynasty started at the end of 2008, when I read The Other Boleyn Girl at the recommendation of my friend Dawnie. The book is hilariously thick, but I devoured the pages. I love reading about history, and royalty, but it tends to be very dry, and that rubs the nerves. I figured out I am a fan of historical fiction, not so much the nonfiction.

I’d never seen the television show The Tudors, however, until the idea to get it from the library popped randomly into my head. I got Season 1, watched it voraciously, and immediately put Seasons 2 and 3 on hold. I would’ve made an entry after Season 1, but I was too focused on getting the next and next and next. I decided halfway through Season 3 I would just write an entry about the entire series.

The show is beyond phenomenal. Though to be fair, I’m not watching it for historical accuracy. I know about as much about England’s political history as I do about it’s political present. It’s sad, really. I knew Kate and William were getting married, Harry dressed as a Nazi, and the royal prince wanted to be a woman’s tampon. That’s the knowledge I retain.

Anyway, back to more pleasant matters.

I don’t believe I’d ever paid attention to Jonathon Rhys Meyer. I’m sure I’d seen a picture of him before, but he wasn’t an actor I was aware of, nor were any of the main cast. I did not realize how much pretty I was missing out on.

Henry the VIII was known for being a brutally handsome, charismatic man. I didn’t know this before I started looking into the Tudor dynasty, because if you look at pictures of him, he looks like that creepy uncle you always avoid at family functions. JRM (May I call you JRM? Rawr) plays Henry with a passion and vigor that has to be seen to be understood. It would be very easy to screw up this character. He’s a monster. He beheads people! He orders people to be exiled, burned at the stake, drawn and quartered, and when he didn’t get his way, he forced a religious change on an entire country. He neglected his children because they were girls, hated his wives when they wouldn’t give him a son. There can’t be an ounce of good in this man, and he should’ve been assassinated in Season 2!

But he’s not a monster. A spoiled brat? Dear god, yes. Life lesson in how pandering to your child’s ever need is dangerous? Oh, yes. Reason prenuptial agreements were invented? Boy howdy. But creature worthy of nothing but hatred and murder attempts? Nah.

He didn’t care about anything that didn’t further his cause. King Henry was the original purveyor of “Want. Take. Have.” And he had women, and children, and riches, and war. And he also got his ass handed to him a few times by his neighboring countries. And it’s all spelled out beautifully in these four seasons. But the reason I like this show so much isn’t about the war, and the politics, and the fighting over religious tyranny. This is a show about his relationships, with the political turmoil as filler in between.

Wife number one was Catherine of Aragon, played by Maria Doyle Kennedy. Queen Catherine was a proud, strong lady, who upheld her dignity until the very end. According to history, Henry was devoted to his former sister-in-law, who he married after his brother died.

We didn’t quiiiite see the devotion in show form. In fact, without the showing of any kinds of affection, the pairing was just odd. She’s obviously older than he is, and far too classy and graceful for his younger ways. In a different setting, you’d think he married her for her money. Their breakup was painful to watch, and the treatment of Princess Mary was even worse.

Enter Anne Boleyn. The villain in all the stories about King Henry’s wives. And my newest girl crush. Have you seen Natalie Dormer? I’d have my head cut off for a moment with her. She’s breathtaking, and her acting is off the charts. She is incredible in the role, with all of the charm you would expect from a woman who stole the heart of a King. She was the first person to steal Henry away from married life, and she really was the wind that blew the shit straight into the fan. Whoever played this part had to be brilliant at it, and Natalie was seemingly born for it.

My heart broke at the end of Season 1, because, hey, spoiler alert, she’s not going to be around for long. I rightly assumed she was going to be topless by the Season 2 finale, and that made me absorb every moment of her throughout the season. And what a role she played. The sexual chemistry between Henry and Anne was so believable. But really, who could blame either one of the actors for a real life attraction? Every scene was sexually charged, and when the damn finally burst, it led to the hottest sex scenes in an otherwise extremely gratuitous series.

But I’m not saying all this just because I love love love her sexuality and charm. You felt what she felt. The vulnerability boiling under the surface, her realization that while she had won Henry, she had also opened the door for other women in the court to come in and do the same to her. When she lost the baby after fighting Henry over his latest mistress, you couldn’t help but burn for her.

And then they bumped her off. And we got THIS dreck. I realize that this is who Henry claimed was his real and true wife, because she bore him a son. I also think it’s because she was so DAMN BORING. She kicked off Season 3, which was the weakest season of all. It was depressing.

Nothing much happened in Season 3. They couldn’t show Henry’s fattening up, because JRM is, as previously mention, a sexy motherfucker, and they didn’t want to ruin that. Great job with realism there. So he mostly just became His Royal Majesty Sir Whineypants. The wife died, and aww sad, but hey, I’ve got a son, so who cares?

Then Anne of Cleeves rolls in. Anne of Cleeves is supposed to be hideously ugly. Now, I’m neither a Joss Stone supporter or hater. I don’t care much about her one way or the other. But they did a really great job of making her unappealing. Unfortunately, in doing so, they made her unappealing to the audience. Who cares about a queen that no one particularly likes? Once the divorce was settled and her head was still in tact, she got a little more interesting, but again, total non entity. Season 3 was horrible.

Season 4. Queen Slutty. You really couldn’t help but not like this girl. Young and frivolous and spoiled, you kept hoping Princess Mary was going to haul back and slap the shit out of her.

Season 4 was an upswing from Season 3, but definitely nowhere near as interesting as the first two seasons. Which is a shame, because so much major stuff happens. Henry’s downward spiral into true madness was done beautifully. Everything was falling apart at the seams, and the kingdom was running amuck. Good times, not that I was really following everything that was happening. Again, I prefer the interpersonal.

No one cares about the final queen. Seriously.

I loved the show. And not solely for JRM and Natalie Dormer. It’s corset porn at it’s very best, and no one loves corset porn more than I do. The gowns and wardrobe for all of the court were beautiful, and made you realize why period pieces are so fun. The acting is superb all around, including the young actors who play Henry’s children. Lady Mary, especially. I’d very much like Showtime to keep going, and tell the story of them. That way I don’t have to watch the Elizabeth movies with that horrible woman in them.

So congratulations to William and Catherine. May you have a long, happy marriage. May you be truly happy, as you appear to be, rather than seemingly happy and really miserable, as William’s parents were. And may both of you keep your shape, keep your sanity, and keep your head.

I take it you think everybody is who they say they are

2011-03-13T21:23:00.002-05:00

Recent tragedy in my life has pretty much cut me off from watching TV or movies for the past two weeks. I tried to watch a few different things, Season 4 of The Tudors, which I’ve been waiting for from the library for months. 12 Angry Men. The Last Samurai. Okay, I didn’t try particularly hard to watch that one, only pretended to.

But I finally got a weekend “to myself” (read: at home working/moping rather than trying to run around putting out fires), and a couple of brand new (to me) movies. To celebrate this momentous occasion, I blog.

I saw the trailer for Shutter Island movie during whichever Scream Awards it premiered on. I thought, “Wow, a suspense movie by Scorcese, starring Leonardo DiCaprio? This is going to be great! How could it not be?”

I started watching the movie Saturday night. And fell asleep. Several times. Finally gave up, hoping that watching it Sunday morning it would be more interesting. Fell asleep again. Between this and The Depahted, Martin Scorcese is losing some serious points with me.

The worst part is, this should be a movie I would love. Creepy mental asylum, total mind fuckage where you suspect something is going to happen, but have no idea what it. Creepy doctors, all worlds of mystery and suspense. This is totally my genre!

Except I didn’t give a damn about any of the characters. As a matter of fact, the only semblance of sympathy I had through the entire movie was for the characters at Dachau. From the jump, I didn’t care about Teddy’s dead wife. Then when he started seeing her everywhere, I pretty much had it figured that he was, indeed, one of the looney bin occupants, and this was an elaborate dream world. The only part I didn’t see coming was the children being his, and that the doctor had planned it.

I seriously may never watch another Scorcese flick again. At least not a new one.

Salt, on the other hand, not only lived up to every expectation I had, it blew them all out of the water and brought my Angelina fangirling to a brand new level. It was not hard to surprise me, though, seeing as how my knowledge of the movie was extremely limited. Originally a male lead, rewritten specifically for her. Bond/Bourne-esque, and The Operative from Serenity is in it. That’s my knowledge.

I always make the error of watching Special Features before the film. Not all of them, if it looks like it’s obviously going to spoil me, I won’t do it. And of course I wait until I’ve viewed the film once before watching any commentary. But I watched a couple of featurettes which pretty much caught me up on the basic premise, without giving really anything away.

Similar to Mr. And Mrs. Smith, we start out with a very domesticated Jolie character, with the knowledge that she’s anything but. I have never liked her as a blonde, not even when she was macking on Christian Kane. And the blonde wig here was just tragic. But the moment the camera rounded her and we saw the black hair, the payoff was well worth it.

As much as I love emotional scenes with this actress, her real talent is in the action, and this movie is crammed with enough fight porn to fill even the most macho of macho men’s quotas for the year. And the best part is that these fight scenes don’t feel choreographed, like with Mr and Mrs Smith, but spur of the moment, vicious and mean and brutal.

And that sums her up in a nutshell. Evelyn Salt/Natasha Chenkova was mean. And that’s what makes this stand out next to other action movies. In the original script, it was a male lead, fighting to fight, yes, but also to rescue his wife and child. Angelina immediately said, “Erm, yeah, fuck that, no kid.” We got a little heart and spirit with her quest for her husband, and the heartbreak on her face for that split second after they murder her husband is very real, and extremely painful. But she snaps back, and keeps going, and turns into the baddest badass you’d never want to run into, male or female.

The pacing of the movie felt weird. It didn’t feel like there was really a beginning, and the end was strange and abrupt. Obviously leaving an opening for a sequel, which I am not averse to. But still, I watched it twice, once with commentary, and still didn’t feel there was a middle. Then again, I don’t watch a lot of Bond-esque movies, so maybe I’m just not used to it.

My Angelina fangirling is safe once more. Amazing.

My Leonardo love is in serious jeopardy, and may not recover.

I Remember My Dream Now

2011-02-20T21:41:00.004-06:00

When the promos for The Walking Dead first started making their way into my internet world, I was less than impressed. I enjoy a good George Romero film as much as the next person, but a TV show about zombies? Really?

Two things changed my mind. The first, that this show was going to air on AMC. This is the channel that airs Mad Men. It’s hard to believe that it would waste air time on a show strictly about mmmm, brains. Secondly, in watching the promotional trailers, I noticed it was from the creators of The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile. Now, both of those movies are the brain children of Stephen King, and they’re both very intense, and beautifully done. Never in a million years would I watch either of those and think, “Wow, these people really need to put a new spin on the zombie genre.”

When I mentioned on Twitter and the book of face that I was considering giving it a shot, I got bombarded with WD comic love. Oh. This is a comic? That got my attention. So I set my DVR to record the series, and promptly forgot about it. Well, to be more accurate, I was so bombarded with other things to watch that I didn’t carve out time to watch it. Then the New Orleans Comic Con announced three actors from the show were coming, and I realized if I didn’t watch the show, I was going to be that person. “Oh, yeah, the show looks great. I have it recorded. NO idea who you are. Nice to meet you, though.”

So, I set the weekend before the con aside and watched the six episodes that comprise season one. And then screamed in rage that it only lasted six episodes, and I had an entire nine months to wait for the next season.

From the very start this show grabbed my attention. Rick Grimes walking around the car graveyard with his gas can. The slow, dragging walk of a seemingly innocent child, carrying her teddy bear. Rick calling to her, and me quietly whispering to the TV, “Zombie. Zombie. Zombie girl. No, really, zombie. Run.” She turns, and we see her face absolutely decimated. And he shoots her. BAM. Start of the season. How can you not immediately need to see more?

Then we follow up the teaser with…two cops sitting in a car having lunch. Oy. Exposition. It was odd, but the conversation about Lori and Carl really did set up the heart break you knew was coming as the episode progressed. I recalled from the trailer that Rick wakes up in a hospital after the bad stuff has already happened, so when he got shot the first time, I was pretty laid back about it. Then he got shot AGAIN. And the shot of him laying on his back, staring at the sky, so scared and horrified, absolutely ripped my lungs from my chest. At that moment, I knew that we were in for a ride with this actor.

Andrew Lincoln is amazing at putting every ounce of emotion into his acting. When he feels something, he shows it. There’s no pensive forehead furrowing, or cupped chin. His eyes give away what he’s feeling. The casting in this show is really spot on with all of the actors, but I feel secure in saying he’s the best choice they could’ve made for Grimes. When he wakes up in the hospital all alone, my skin crawled. I have only waken up once in a hospital, and that was with family nearby, and the sound of nurses outside my door. If I woke up to dead silence, I don’t think I would know how to react. When Grimes fell out of the bed, and hit the button, crying out for a nurse, I almost teared up. That is the ultimate definition of vulnerability.

There was no score for the first half of this episode. As the Whedon fans learned, music takes away from powerful emotional scenes. If you really want to drive home fear and have the audience experience the emotions along with the characters, you remove the distractions. I felt the anxiety of him walking around the hospital. When he went to his home, and his wife and son were nowhere to be found, my heart wept for him. When he fell to floor in a fetal position, sobbing, I did tear up. The entire first half of this season premiere was really and truly amazing. This is why I was wrong. The world does need a zombie TV show.

Then he gets hit by a shovel. And I cackled. The introduction of Morgan and Duane were much needed, not just for exposition, but to add another dimension to Grimes. We’ve seen him relaxed, we’ve seen him vulnerable. Now we need to see him get his power back. The story of the father and son could’ve been pretty one note without the addition of, as I call her, the Zombie Momma. In the entire six episode run, nothing wigged me out more than watching her slowly ascend the stairs, and stare, dead-eyed, at the peep hole. Keisha Tillis is a very beautiful woman. But I told her at the con that she scared the piss out of me.

Duane running to hide his head in the covers and sob was already heart wrenching enough. When Morgan has the rifle aimed at her head, and can’t pull the trigger, you feel that emotion. It leads to self questioning. Would you be able to pull that trigger? I think of the people I love most in the world. I’d sooner be zombie food than shoot any of them in the head, even with the knowledge that it would be saving them. These are thoughts that your average zombie movie won’t bring up. Zombies are zombies, they do not inspire emotions. Not even baby zombies.

Then Grimes sets out on his own. He gets to a farm house, and goes to the door to ask if he can pilfer some of their gasoline. And this is where I got grossed out the first time. This being on AMC, I expected profanity. This being the zombie genre, I was prepared for gore. But Christ tap dancing on a cracker, this show is graphic. It’s not enough that we get zombies chomping down on people and ripping flesh. Oh, no. They go and have the refugees slamming pick axes into their skull. When brain matter hit the camera, I was pretty much over the excessive carnage.

One thing that we will not be discussing in this entry is the horse. NO. NO NO NO NO NO. No discussion of the horse. I made my thoughts known about the horse on Twitter, and that is just FINE.

The shot of the zombies (geeks? Is that the word they kept using for them?) crawling all over the tank, and then the aerial shot of just how many of them there were in Atlanta, seriously left my skin crawling. They look like ants, and the entire visual and thought process just…it’s wigging me out as I think about it. It’s a really great way to show just how screwed up the world is, and how screwed the survivors really are.

The first refugee we meet is Glenn. He is very much my favorite. From the moment he called Grimes a dumbass in the tank, he pretty much won me over. I’m reading the comic book right now, which is intense and dark and strangely paced. The TV show veers completely off course, which I’m appreciative for. Because I don’t think Glenn is going to survive the book. Is that a spoiler?

It should be hard to bond with the refugees. You realize they’re all potential zombie food, and that’s sad and all, but why bother to get to know their story at all? Then Norman Reedus comes rolling out of the woods, and my first thought was, “Nooooooooo, not zombie food noooooooooooooo!” I wasn’t looking forward to meeting his character, though, figuring he was going to be a racist dickwad like his brother. Other than being dismissive of Glenn, he wasn’t nearly as bad, though. And when Glenn was kidnapped by the “gang members”, his reaction was perfect. I do love me some Reedus.

Speaking of dickwad Merle, this show completely fucked with my head. I hated Merle, and really wanted Rick to blow his head off. But then he cuffs him to the pipe, and they leave him there. The guy whose name I can’t be bothered to remember comes running up with the key, and it falls, and they LEAVE HIM. That was more upsetting than it ever should have been. I knew they weren’t going to find him alive when they got back. I figured either the zombies would have him, or he would’ve cut off his own hand. The hanging shot of the cuffs was an extremely powerful visual.

When they left Jim at the tree, I was bawling. I didn’t expect to like him, he was one of the non-characters, like the family who went their own way. His story about watching his family get eaten tore every heart string from my body.

I knew from shot one of the Mother and Son that this was Lori and Carl. I pretty much figured they wouldn’t kill either of them off. When they cut to her banging Shane, I winced. That’s gonna suck. But the reunion of the three of them was so superbly done. Talking with Chandler Rigg’s father at convention, he said the boy did that scene over 10 times, and each time he had that same level of emotion. The kid can act. The tension between Lori and Shane once Grimes got back was expected, but what I did NOT expect was her revelation that he’s the one who told her Rick was dead. Youch. Well played.

I should have seen this shit coming. 12 years as a Whedon fan, the second I saw the sisters on the damn boat, I should’ve known one of them was going down. And I also should’ve known which one. Yet it didn’t kick in until moments before it happened.

Their relationship was too good for the show, really. They were sisters with no sibling rivalry, orphaned and caring towards one another. Yeah, that doesn’t work on a drama show. One of them’s getting eaten. I figured Andrea was going to shoot her sister, but the way in which it happened was so damned heartbreaking. This show will grab you by your balls, and you have to fight to get them back.

I was very interested when they reached the lab. In supernatural-to-real-life movies, I want the why. Tell me about the virus, the mutation, the killer birds, the Hellmouth. Tell me why these things are happening. I was kind of let down on this one. We see it in the live scan (how cool was the scan of the bullet going through her skull?), but there’s not much else to go on. I seriously hope we get more information on this, but from what I can tell from the comics, that part hasn’t been written yet. So I guess I have a ways to go before I get any answers.

Creepy lab guy was creepy. I understood from the setup of him that he was crazy from being alone for so long, researching with his dead wife’s bits and pieces. But then he actually gets company, and he turns out to be even weirder than before. Not actually warning them about the lockdown only being the tip of the freakshow iceberg.

I liked the group dynamic once they got into the lab. Safe and secure, they felt more comfortable laughing. There were books to read and showers to take. Everyone seemed a lot more comfortable with themselves. You just knew shit was about to go wrong.

Lab go boom.

Where the hell is my second season?

Seriously, what a fanfuckingtastic show. I can’t imagine anyone thinking it would get canceled in the first season, and only having a six episode run. Seriously, people, what the hell are you doing to me? That’s worse than Mad Men’s 12 episode seasons. Knock it off, AMC.

Side note: Thanks to Jane Espenson for her writing sprints on Twitter. She got the majority of this entry written by having one while I was home and able-bodied. Then a week later, I finished it.

I’m just awesome like that.

New Orleans Comic Con

2011-02-07T22:06:00.014-06:00

Last weekend, I had the extreme pleasure of being chosen to be one of two official photographers at the New Orleans Comic Con. It was my first Comic Con ever, and it makes me wish that I worked for Wizard Con and could follow them around taking pictures for them all the time.

This blog entry is about my personal experience, which means I’m only going to have information about what I experienced personally, and my thoughts on those parts. The pictures are either my personal (unofficial) photos, or photos I borrowed from my co-photographer, Laurie Lee.

So, if you’d like to take a gander, I think it’s worth it. If only to hear what a pathetic fangirl I turn out to be.

I arrived on Friday morning at 8:30 (late) and met with the Con organizers and other volunteers. I got to wear a horrendously hideous bright yellow shirt and a name tag. I’m a name tag person! I promptly grabbed a marker and wrote “Bunny” on it, and also “Photographer”, as my contact wasn’t there yet to give me the official fancy badge.

The con didn’t start until 10:00, and the first panel wasn’t until 11:45, so I spent the majority of the morning helping to get all the fans wristbanded. The costumes were hilarious, and the fangirls and boys were adorably tunnel visioned. Once I got out from behind the desk and started snapping pictures, things started getting more interesting.

I am the wrong kind of nerd for Comic Con. I don’t read comic books, in general. The only ones I try are those specifically recommended to me, such as Sandman or The Walking Dead. I’ve never seen a Star Wars movie. And the last video game I played was on the original Sega Genesis. So as I walked the lines of people waiting to get in, snapping pictures and cooing over how amazing they looked, in my mind I’m thinking, “Am I supposed to know what you are?”

I walked up and down the line, and saw X-Men, super heroes, villains, one Horrible Doctor, and tails that I didn’t understand the full horror of until the costume contest later that night. The line was long, but it wasn’t cold outside, and everyone was in pretty good spirits.

At 10:00, people started moving in. When I first walked in, I made a few rounds to orient myself about where each celebrity would be. All of the Whedonverse actors would be on the same aisle, so I didn’t have to split my attention too much from them. Those actors hadn’t arrived, or were still being set up, so I walked around and looked at the other actors on the floor.

The first person I saw was Ernie Hudson. Ghostbusters! Actually, when I think Ghostbusters, I picture Bill Murray. When it comes to Mr. Hudson, it’s all about The Crow for me. He was incredible in it, and it’s one of my all-time favorite films. I got a picture of him with fans, and his booth right across from the Louisiana Ghostbusters. Very clever placement there.

In another area was Louis Gossett, Jr. Of all the (non Whedon) actors at the Con, he intimidated me the most. He is the only actor I did not say anything non-official to. I lucked out in a huge way, though. As I stood to one side, snapping a picture of him with fans, he noticed Ernie Hudson walking nearby and called him over. I immediately motioned to his manager, and asked if I could get a picture of the two of them together. His manager was scary and ready to eat me and my first born, so I only got one picture. Wherein he blinked. Those are the breaks, I suppose. I got to meet Peter Tork from The Monkees, who is so hilarious and friendly. I didn’t speak to him long, but I let him know that I watched the show as a child, and still listened to the music. He was very sweet. I also walked past Aaron Douglas from Battlestar: Galactica. But more on him later.

Chandler Riggs, Keisha Tillis, and Adrian Kali Turner from The Walking Dead were in a booth together. They were being interviewed by media when I walked up, and I got a few good pictures of them with the press. I told them that I had just finished up the first season of the show the weekend before (future entry coming), and that the three of them had made me cry, scared the hell out of me, and cracked me up, respectively. I spoke to the parents of the two boys, who were very friendly and personable, though I had the best conversation with Chandler’s dad. He told me about what the filming was like, and how he was cast. We also discussed Cheap Trick. Very cool guy.

Ray Park was the very first booth on the Whedonverse aisle. I was trying to get a crowd shot by standing on a chair near his booth with a few of the personnel there to ensure I didn’t fall. A very angry gentleman (Handler? Manager?) came up behind me and demanded to know why I was blocking his way into Ray’s booth. I hopped down, turned to the others, and said, “I just got scolded.” I looked apologetically at Ray, and he just smiled at me. I’ve never seen any of his projects, but he’s a good guy in my book.

As I was looking around near Ray’s booth, I spotted a dark haired, lean and muscular man with glass-cutting cheekbones walking towards me. My heart leapt into my suddenly bone dry throat, and the hand holding my camera gave a few epileptic shakes. Why, hello there, James Marsters.

All but one of my best memories from this weekend came from the five people in these photos. It took every ounce of strength and professionalism and dignity to stop myself from just hovering like a freak around these people all weekend. As an official volunteer of the con, in THE SHIRT, I wasn’t allowed to be a freak of nature around them. I made it a point not to go up to the celebrity booths if they were occupied with fans, because people who pay win out over people who were smart enough to volunteer.

The first booth I walked up to was Nick Brendon and Kelly Donovan. As expected, they had already accumulated a line. Nick was occupied, but Kelly was hanging to the side, just observing everything. I caught his attention and asked if I could take a photo. He immediately flashed me the brightest, most amazing smile. Involuntarily, my mouth opened and I said, “You have got such a wonderful smile.” I don’t know if I turned bright red, or just a soft shade. He was incredibly sweet, and I scurried away.

Marsters’ booth was swarmed. Luckily, he was next to an empty booth (Julie Benz’s original booth, and she wouldn’t be there until Sunday), however THAT was also swarmed, with the fans who wanted to snap a picture and not pay money. Like me. I edged up next to the volunteer monitoring the line, and snapped a few shots of him talking to fans. My first sign of how very expressive he was. Also, my first real look at his entourage. A super friendly looking British woman, a less friendly looking woman, and The Manager Of Doom Who Wants to Eat Your Soul. More on him later.

Clare Kramer had a few fans around her, so I moved to James C. Leary, who…didn’t. I snapped pictures of him while telling him what a fan I was, and how much better I thought he looked out of the Clem suit. We chatted for quite a bit, including me getting very upset when he informed me he had given up on Hollywood. He’s now in the business of making video games, which is awesome, but still. I prefer him on my television as opposed to in something I don’t touch. I also harassed him endlessly about logging into Twitter and updating more regularly. Or ever.

There was a lull at Clare Kramer’s booth, so I moved over to get a picture and speak with her. She was immediately open and friendly, and pretty much from the jump stole the title of Sweetheart of the Con. Her kindness was genuine, and she seemed really happy to be there. We discussed her beautiful little girls, and her plans for their upcoming birthday parties. I told her that if it weren’t for the Mayor, she would’ve been my favorite Buffy villain. She said she hears that he’s the fan favorite constantly, but she’s never seen Season 3. I told her if she only watches one season other than her own, it should be that one. Her fans returned, and I moseyed away.

At a little before 11:45, I headed upstairs for the panel area. There were two rooms for the panels, Room A and Room B. As is expected, Room A is for the bigger names, Room B is for the smaller. All of the actors appeared in A, and the comic artists and writers were relegated to Room B. Laurie and I were to photograph approximately 3-5 minutes of each Panel. This meant leaving the A panels and going to the B. This, to put it lightly, made me cranky. Damn professionalism.

I only got to sit in for about 25 minutes of James’ panel. This was before Laurie and I hatched our ingenious scheme, so I was standing in the doorway, and she was on her hands and knees in front of the dais. It only took me a few minutes to catch up and crawl over to where she was. James is extremely funny, and not a little ADD. He sat on the table, swinging his legs and gesturing with the mic. The biggest revelation of the panel was that he and Patricia got married extremely recently. He talked about going to school, and a little about his experience on Buffy, and a lot about Caprica. I moved out of the way ahead of him, and got a great picture of him signing a fan’s bra. Not while it was on her.

The next panel was Billie Dee Williams. As I said above, I’m not a Star Wars fan. But he has a very soothing voice, if a bit monotone. I enjoyed the four or so minutes I stayed in there before hustling out to go to the simultaneous comic panel. I left as he was saying that Colt 45 always worked for him. Heh.

Please note again, I am not a comic book fan. I have absolutely nothing pertinent to say about the comic panels I sat in on. The only one I might’ve been interested in was the author of The Crow, and sadly that was on Sunday as I was down taking photographs of the lesser marketed starving comic artists.

Next up was the Nick and Kelly panel. This was the best panel of the weekend. I say that confidently, despite not having sat in for any panel on Sunday other than Julie Benz. Again, Laurie and I were on our hands and knees snapping pics, and I was too busy laughing to take a good deal. Nick is a dirty, dirty boy. A fan got up to the mic to ask a question, and she had multi colored hair. Nick immediately said, “I want to lick your hair.” Needless to say, this led to serious dirty jokes and sexual innuendo. He and Kelly practically had a contest going on. At one point, Kelly said, “It’s all about the backrubs and blowjobs.” And then a small child came up to the mic to ask a question, and the crowd roared. Nick invited her up to get a hug, and there was a loud, resounding “Awwww”. Another little girl came up to the mic later solely for a hug. Only the little ones can get away with that.

And no Nick panel would be complete without it:

After the Nick and Kelly panel, Laurie realized that we needed to do something to save our knees and backs. We took our sticker name badges, and put them on two chairs in the front row. Both had our names, and hand-written “Photographer” on them, and we also added the word “Reserved”. Let some little fangirl bitches try to take our seats. We were official, and now we had official seats.

I don’t remember much from the Clare and James Leary panel. I know that there was a reference to Clem eating cats, and James’ wife believing he didn’t eat enough. You could tell how many people had that joke fly straight over their head.

I ended up arriving late to the Aaron Douglas panel. I walked into the very large room from a back door, and as I was making my way to the front of the room, a fan at the microphone said, “So, I have a question about BSG, and this is a spoiler.” I could not run. So instead, I just moved my legs harder, trying to propel myself to the next door. As I turned, almost safe, the fan spoke again. The wind went out of my sails, and I slunk away. After about ten minutes, I went back in, and sat to take more pictures, listening the entire time to them discuss the finale of BSG. Sigh.

Adam West and Burt Ward finished up the panels I was paying attention to. They were so picture phobic, Laurie had to practically sign over an internal organ to get permission from their people. The men were both delightful and very funny, but a few times I thought I saw a vein twitch on Adam West’s head when Laurie took a picture.

The last official events of the night were the costume contests. First up was the child’s costume contest, open to kids 10 and under. I thought that was a bit much, seeing as how there were 14 entries for this, and what felt like 100 entries for “adults”, many of those being under the age of 18. But the prizes given away were stuffed animals and the like, so I suppose that was only fair.

The costumes were truly amazing. I’d already seen some of the children throughout the con, but a great deal I had not, including the X-Men twins (Rogue and Storm) and a tiny Spike and Drusilla (Mommy dressed as a very grown up Drusilla). The kids obviously had a great time, and were an absolute nightmare to photograph, as they would not stop moving. Chandler Riggs from Walking Dead was a “judge”, though it was decided there was a 14-way tie. The children swarmed the toys, and I was jealous when I saw them walking away. They had a stuffed snail, for crying out loud.

The adult costume contest was a whole other thing. Luckily for the parents, the majority of the children cleared out before those costumes started rolling out. Each costume paraded up the aisle between the two sections of chairs, then came to the front, said a little something about their costume, and posed. This was when I got the most severe rug burn of the night, ducking and dodging around the NON OFFICIAL photographers to get pictures of each costume, then scurrying back to get the picture at the front of the room.

James C Leary was one of the judges, along with a fabulous lady who does costume design and whose name I don’t know. She was hilarious, and James was inappropriate. Jarrett Crippen, aka The Defuser, had acted as an MC for all of the panels, and he was judge and MC for this. I think between him and James, any parent still keeping their child in the room was extremely uncomfortable. The entire contest may be the funniest thing I will see all year.

But the best part of the night came second to last, when these ladies came dancing down the aisle. Orion's Envy came to the front, and proceeded to put on a very long, extremely well choreographed belly dance routine. If we had realized how extensive it would be, and how truly hilarious James Leary’s reaction would be, there would be both picture and video. Sadly, we realized halfway through that they weren’t intending on stopping anytime soon.

James danced. And when I say danced, I mean he did the greatest white boy dance ever seen. He also pulled out his wallet. Sadly, it would appear he had no dollar bills. The girls had to have known this was going on behind them, but they held their composure beautifully. All day people had wondered who “The Green Girls” were. The set up had a huge payoff. They did beautifully.

After the costume contest, there was a bit of time before James Marsters’ concert, at 9:00. Everyone cleared out of the room, and I headed downstairs with Laurie to get bottled water. We had our reserved stickers, so I didn’t have to worry about not having a good seat. Laurie headed upstairs before I did, and by the time I got up there, the line was down the hall, and she was nowhere in sight. I realized she was inside, enjoying her view of James doing a soundcheck.

And I couldn’t find a way to discreetly slip inside without looking like an asshole. I called her quite a few untoward names in my head as I smiled sweetly at the volunteers and the people waiting in line.

I was allowed to go in a bit before the show, to prepare to make sure everyone entered in an orderly fashion. James was finishing up, and quickly headed out of the room to wait for everyone to get in and be seated. Laurie and I had an agreement that I would record the video, and she would take photos. So the photographs to the right are copyright her, not myself.

James performed for the entire hour, and had entirely too much fun goading the crowd. He was sweet and funny and above all a very very naughty little puppy. I had not heard his new album, Like a Waterfall, so imagine my surprise when I heard the words to his song “Look at Me”.

You can’t tell from the quality of the video, but James is grinning at me for a good portion. More on that later.

At the very end, as James is thanking everyone for coming out and preparing to head out the room, he quickly and casually said, “And you can fight over the set list.”

Only I didn’t hear him clearly at first. It took a second for me to realize what he said. And I’d been eyeing that piece of paper for an hour. I launched myself from my chair towards the stage, and noticed a shadow to my right. I dived for the paper, flinging myself onto the stage and nearly coming to rest on the paper itself, my hand grasping part of it and someone else's hand holding the other part. I had no idea who it was, and I did not care. It could’ve been an adorable five year old, or a quadriplegic octogenarian. That. set. list. was. mine.

It turned out the hand belonged to the unstoppable Rosie, a woman I had seen around the James fandom world and knew was hardcore. And who I KNEW had seen James live before, and who could completely afford to GIVE IT OVER. I was. not. letting. go. And then, as I’m watching James traipse out the door, he turns, and spots the two of us. More accurately, me, full on looking at him with my hand behind my back, holding his set list and turning eight shades of red. He grinned, and walked out the door.

Got the set list, though. So, hey. Thanks, Rosie!

So, that was Saturday. Sunday, I got there at 8:30 again. Spoke to the photographer guru, who said he wanted more photographs of the comic artists, along with the panels. Other than Julie Benz, I was not intending to stay at any of the panels long, so I was planning on staying downstairs for most of the day anyway.

Julie arrived around 10:00. Her people had sent word ahead to have her photographs ready on the table for her to sign for the fans, so I had laid them out and covered them to stop anyone from picking them up.

I’ve always liked the belief that if you have nothing nice to say, you shouldn’t say much of anything at all.

Julie signed autographs at her booth. She had a panel at 11:00am.

After I headed downstairs, I hit the Artist Alley like I was Ike Turner.

As I said, I have no comic book knowledge. The majority of the artists there were not huge superstars, though, so this worked nicely. I ooh’d and ahh’d over artist renditions of popular characters (Most Overdrawn Character Award goes to the X-Men), but when it came to original artwork, I took the time to stop and look through portfolios after snapping their photos. I even (gasp!) purchased comics, though they were old school Buffy and Angel. So does that even count?

My favorite artists were two gentleman who were quite obviously bored. I rounded the corner to an aisle, walked to the first table, and burst out laughing. I turned, composed myself, and turned back around. Promptly started laughing again. The handsome blue-eyed gentleman at the table watched me, nonplussed, from behind his giant hand-drawn mustache that covered his face from upper lip to bottom of his chin. I could not take a picture without laughing, so I finally just gave up and chuckled through the photograph. He offered to draw me one, and I asked for a villainous curly-cue. He put QUITE a lot of effort into the artwork, and even gave it to me on the house. I wore it to a few tables, but everytime I talked, the tape unstuck, plus I felt myself turn red as each artist looked up and did a double take.

I came to another table, where an artist was lazily scribbling upside down on the tablecloth in front of him. I snapped a picture of him drawing, then politely stood by to watch him draw. I wasn’t planning on staying, but as the creation took shape, I was essentially mesmerized. In a matter of maybe two, three minutes, he drew a large, fully formed character, muscley and Hulk-esque, holding a teddy bear and sucking his thumb. I was slack jawed at that moment. He was amused by how blown away I was, and promptly got an X-Acto knife and cut it out of the table cloth for me. Despite begging and pleading to other con volunteers and employees, no one could tell me where to get him another table cloth. If he shows up next year, hopefully he asks for a few extras.

The panels that I missed were Claudia Christian, of Babylon 5 fame. I did not watch her in that, but when I went to get her official picture, she offered to get in the photograph with me, which was very sweet. She was extremely nice and personable, and I pretty much slapped the hell out of myself yesterday when I realized she was on Freaks and Geeks. My memory is not what it never was. Ray Park and Louis Gossett Jr also spoke, as well as Mike Grell and Mark Ryan. Mike Grell and I had a very hilarious conversation about my name (Bunny), which led to him telling me a seriously awesome story about seeing Hugh Hefner in a men’s restroom. You’ll have to ask me personally to hear the story. Mark Ryan is a wonderful British man who took a photo with me, even though I didn’t have a clue who he was. Voice of Bumblebee in Transformers. Never saw it. Again, I am a bad geek. But he was a wonderful man, and I’m glad I got a photo. Walter Koenig from Star Trek had the second to last panel. He is the only actor I did not speak to nor get a picture of. Not that I didn’t care to, it just didn’t happen. There was also a Walking Dead panel at the end of the day, which neither Laurie nor myself made it to.

I spent the majority of the afternoon stalking the Whedon booths. The fans had finally died down a bit, save for the ever present hardcore Marsters girls. Gotta love them. I know he does. I chatted with Leary and Clare Kramer a bit, and got both of them to sign my photographer badge. Handed my badge to the volunteer manning Julie’s booth, and she got her to sign it for me. Again, if you can’t say anything nice. I was standing between Nick’s booth and James’ booth, and Nick came out from behind the booth to hug a fan. I quirked an eyebrow and said, “Hold up. If you’re giving out free hugs, I need in on this.”

He hugged another fan, then turned to me, arms stretched. I hugged him, and he squeezed me very tightly. Very. The good kind of hug, not the “pat pat tap tap”. I smiled at him, my skin tingly. He ended up being the only Whedon actor not to sign my badge. But I’ll take the hug over the autograph any day.

James was still overfanned, so I walked over to Aaron Douglas’s booth for his autograph, where the delirium and over stimulation of the past day and a half led to…inappropriateness. Inappropriateness of the best kind, mind you. Laurie wandered over at one point, and joined in on the conversation. I cannot in good conscience get into said discussion here. But suffice to say, Aaron has won a spot in the cold black heart of Bunny. And other places.

Walking back, Nick was still with fans, but Kelly was free, so I moseyed up to his side of the table and quietly asked if he would sign the badge for me. I told him what a genuine pleasure it was to meet him, and that I had tweeted how his smile was better than Nick’s, but that no one should tell him that. Kelly grinned and whispered that they really, really shouldn’t tell Nick. We discussed Louisiana, as he’d lived down here before at one point. He asked what Slidell was like, and said at least it wasn’t Metairie. The conversation was fun, and easy. And truth be told, I’m more than a little in like with Mr. Donovan. He’s thinking about moving down here again. He has a friend working on films down here, and apparently Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter is not only going to be made into a movie, it’s going to be filmed down here. And Kelly wants to do set dressing down here. I said that wasn’t necessary, I was going to see the movie anyway. I also informed him that if needed anything when he moved down here, I was his girl.

Finally the line was dying down for James. I walked over to speak to his manager Steve. Steve is a very very scary gentleman. He’s about eight feet tall, lean and lanky, with a face that has, “Bitch, I will cut you” written all over it. I believe James keeps Steve there for those moments when he doesn’t want to do something, but needs someone else to blame it on. After all, he is there to make money. If you want a photo op, pay the $60 and get it taken professionally. But James can’t say that without looking like an asshole. But Steve can! So, I went to Steve and let him know I wanted to take the official picture for the con, and was that okay. He gave me a look that said, “I could have your toenails ripped out”, but said that was fine, and to just wait in the line. I let a few fans go in front of me, but then some of them started to get bitchy about Steve, so I gave up and moved forward. Steve explained what I wanted to do, and James looked at me, smiling. As I raised the camera, I mentioned that I was a big fan, as well.

“I remember you from the concert.”

Ears start to ring as the blood rushes to my head.

“You have a great face for musicians.”

I. I. I. I. I. I. I.

I snap the picture, smiling at him, and ask with shaky voice, if it would be alright if he signed my photographer badge. He looked to Steve, and I promptly ducked around the lady sitting next to him to confirm it was alright with Steve. He looked exasperated, but another volunteer had asked previously if James could sign her shirt, so he waved her over so James could sign both. As James picked a spot on the badge, he shook his head and said, “I can’t believe you actually want my autograph on this. Too cool.”

I. I. I. I.

I moved away and sat down for a minute, catching my breath. I’ve always been a fan of his acting. Who knew I was one of those fangirls?

More inappropriateness with Aaron, then I found my con “boss” and unloaded the pictures for the day. 5:00 hit, and the fans vacated. The booths started to get disassembled. I walked in, ostensibly to help.

Hey, look. James Leary’s paper name banner, with the photos of him. I should keep those as a souvenir. With the banner. Oh, look, Kelly and Nick’s banners. Oh, there’s Clare’s. Oh. Clare wrote on her tablecloth. They’re going to throw that away.

This became a fan scavenger hunt. It was actually quite a lot of fun.

As I prepared to leave for the day, we were given our con goodie bags, which I still have not looked at in depth. We also got our pick of autographed pictures that the actors had signed specifically for the volunteers. There were none of James, and the only other Whedon actor who signed I was not interested in having an autographed picture of, so I took one of the Aaron Douglas ones, to remind myself of the fun conversations. I also grabbed a previously autographed picture of three people from one of those awful Twilight movies for my friend Lindsey, who has horrid taste in movies, if not friends.

My legs burned from crouching, kneeling and ducking for photographs. My lower back ached, and my knees were torn up from rug burn. I got very little sleep, and ran largely on adrenaline and Starbucks provided by a fellow volunteer. I was worn out, and over stimulated.

One of the top 10 best weekends of my life. Looking forward to next year.

Being Boothy

2011-01-16T11:18:00.004-06:00

In April, I said I was looking forward to Season 5 of Bones. I also said it would take me a year to watch it.

Good news! It only took me nine months! I’m ahead by three.

I wasn’t spoiled for this season like I was the last. I saw one episode, the barbecued body one, because it was an opener for Dollhouse. It didn’t spoil me for anything other than Arastoo’s actual accent. I didn’t know where the storyline was going with Booth and Brennan, but I had the feeling I wasn’t going to like it, no matter what they did.

The good news is, I didn’t hate it as much as I did Season 4. But that doesn’t mean I was happy.

When it was just sexual tension, this relationship was fine. A little fun in the early seasons, with the subtext and small moments. But all of last season, there was so much emphasis on the relationship between Booth and Brennan (Brooth?) that I got more irritated with each episode.

Flash cut to this season, and me fighting not to throw things at my computer monitor.

It’s not just that Booth thought he was in love with Brennan. That I could handle. But the writers completely destroyed her characterization. In the season premiere, the only way she could have been more out of character was if she jumped on Booth, wrapping her thighs around his stomach and humping him to oblivion. She was flirty, and coy, and that is not Brennan. They managed to tone it down a lot as the episodes went along, but to have someone in every single episode point out the sexual chemistry?

Dear writers: Anvils kill. Look it up.

Now, if you want to discuss a relationship that made me squeal with ‘shippy joy, let’s talk about Angela and Hodgins. During Season 4, I was so upset that they broke the couple up. I saw no logical reason, other than to put Angela in an unnecessary lesbian relationship. Roxy was a bitch.

This season, it was obvious they were slowly moving them into position. And it was subtle. Whoever handled this needs to work on the Booth/Brennan dynamic. I might actually support it if they did.

Everything involving these two was fun. I am dying to know what sex act Hodgins did so well it was put into Brennan’s book. His parting comment about other men copying this move, and how she would never be rid of him, had me grinning so hard. It was so perfect. And as always, any opportunity for Billy Gibbons to make a cameo appearance is good in my book.

We also had a brief reappearance of Zach, in the 100th episode. I missed him so.

The 100th episode was actually a lot of fun. Not only do we get a flashback of how everything started, but we also got to see all the characters with their original looks. That was hilariously bad. I mean, Hodgins hair alone. I remember why I didn’t immediately put him and Angela together now.

The first meeting of Camille and Brennan was also perfect. No politeness, Brennan’s trademark abruptness. Caroline basically smacking Booth around and telling him he would never get her office. Much of it was expected, but still funny. I didn’t even mind that Booth and Brennan shared a kiss and almost shared more. THAT makes sense. That could’ve been inserted in seamlessly, without the heavy-handed hinting in the last two seasons. It actually would’ve been better without it.

The most frustrating part is how unnecessary it all is. This season leads me to believe that the writers think the fans are idiots. Obviously, we’re too slow to pick up on the extreme chemistry between Boreanaz and Deschanel. These two have had intense sexual chemistry from the jump, and everyone could pick that up. That is why fans (other than me) have been screaming for a hookup since Season 1.

I prefer to be teased by a show, not held down and handfed information. I will never be satisfied with a show that doesn’t allow me to think on my own. Let me see the chemistry. Stop telling me it’s there.

Alright, I need to move on. I could bitch about this for three entries in a row.

The intern dance continues. I guess we’re going to keep this going until one of them gets a doctorate? I suppose I don’t mind, but it would be nice to trim the fat. I can’t bond with any of them, because we don’t see them on a regular basis.

I hated Daisy a lot less this season. She stood up for herself against Sweets, and got to geek out with Brennan over the mummy find. And seeing Brennan herself allowed to geek out because Daisy was there pretty much wedged her into my heart.

Wendell was a fun one. He and Angela hooking up made sense, and it was sweet and fun. Him paying what little he could to rescue that adorable piglet made my heart give a little cheer. Once he broke up with Angela, he lost all usefulness, but it was fun while it lasted. I loved the entire scholarship storyline, but again. How does one bond with an intern on a steady rotation? Would they have done that for any of the others?

The guest stars were especially on point this season. We had two Whedonverse alumni, the singer of Buckcherry, plus the return of (Chef) Gordon Gordon. We had Boreanaz’s dad in not one, but two cameos, and we had my newly beloved Zooey Deschanel. She was absolutely perfect as Margaret. She and Brennan were so opposite, but still so alike. Even if Zooey didn’t look exactly like her sister, you would still be able to tell those two shared a genetic code.

To have the season open on a scene with Cyndi Lauper set huge expectations for me all season. You don’t start with her and then fail. And the season really lived up to it. And Robert Englund as the extremely creepy grown-up friend to an adolescent Brennan made so much sense, it would’ve been impossible not to use it.

The body set ups this season were so good. A few of them reminded me of the crazy ways they found bodies on Season 1 of Castle. With shows like this, as much as I realize this is an amazing prop department making it all happen, it still totally grosses me to see them. I eyed my cats very differently after seeing what they can do to a body.

And can we mention the testicle flying out of the giant washing machine? Because I think we all learned a little something there.

This season could’ve been a lot worse. It was an improvement from Season 4, and that makes me happy. I’m hoping this upward mobility continues. The final scene between Brennan and Booth really did tug at my heart strings. If this subtlety had been the theme throughout the season, I would’ve been sobbing, begging for them to just run into each other’s arms and kiss for all they were worth.

There’s always next season.

Perfect

2010-12-29T09:07:00.014-06:00

I’ve said before that I never go to the movies. I’m more the kind to wait for it to come out on DVD, then get it from the library eight weeks later when my hold is up. It’s frustrating, sure. But I’m cheap, and some things can’t be helped.

I make rare exceptions, such as Harry Potter, or the rare Disney flicks that my niece and I go to. I’m still wanting to go see Tangled in theaters, but it doesn’t seem like it’s going to happen.

However, when a co-worker showed me the trailer for Black Swan, my first thought was, “When is this coming out, and who is going to come with me to see it?”

As it turns out, it came out here a week after the release, and none of these bitches wanted to come with. What the hell? Luckily for me, my friend Rachael is pretty much a pushover. It’s not that I don’t feel comfortable seeing a movie alone, I just dislike not having someone to discuss it with immediately afterwards.

My first thought upon leaving the theater was, “There is absolutely no way I can write a blog entry about this.”

Let’s see if I can prove myself wrong.

I have a serious appreciation for any movie or television show that is a complete mindfuck. I’ve seen Lost Highway countless times, and I still can’t tell you exactly what happens.

This movie takes the mindfuck genre (please tell me this exists) and takes it to levels not even David Lynch could have imagined.

First and foremost, we have to talk about the imagery in this movie. Even without the extreme elements of the plot, and the beautiful ballet moves, this movie is so visual, you can watch it entirely on mute and still get the feel of it. Each scene, each emotion, each breakdown, it has its own movie aura. We start out soft and pink, then as the downward spiral begins, everything starts growing darker, and darker. By the final hallucination in the apartment, it’s so dark we only get flashcuts of light.

Contrast each of those scenes with the ballet rehearsels, and the extreme practices. Everything very stark and rigid, very clinical. The jumps between the feels of the movie add to the overall jarring effect. I am hesitant to mention how many times in this movie I jumped out of the seat, before the extremeness happened. The score and the jump in the mood has the audience on the edge of their seat before we ever get blood and creepiness. The director of this movie deserves as many Oscar noms as the actresses.

I’m only going to quickly touch on the part where there are far too many mirrors in this movie. I understand why they did it, the mirror image metaphor was too obvious to be ignored, and almost too clichéd, but as someone who has an extremely convoluted mirror fear, brought on by a different movie all together, this was NOT a happy experience. Adds a very different level of hell for me in the anxiety department.

Let’s discuss the absolutely amazing actresses playing the two lead characters. Because if both of these women do not earn every award offered in the industry for these roles, I will call a fixed vote.

Natalie Portman shocked the hell out of me in this movie. I am not a fan of hers. I have honestly never seen a movie that she had a significant role in that did not bore me to tears. I have always found her entirely too stoic, uptight. She strikes me as the type of person who, in real life, considers herself far too intellectual for those around her.

For all those reasons, she was absolutely born to play this role. Nina is so repressed and uptight, you feel uncomfortable watching her on screen. Even when she cuts loose at the bar, you’re waiting for the inevitable fall, and it is glorious. Her descent into utter batshit insanity is so complete and so jarring and every minute you’re just living it with her. Natalie Portman impressed me beyond words. I don’t think any actress has ever turned my opinion around about them as rapidly as she did with this role. I have a newfound respect and admiration for her considerable talents. I don’t care if she’s an uptight frigid bitch in real life, she’s incredible in my book.

It also helps that RyAn linked me to the SNL short she did. My original opinion of her is completely blown.

I have never had a real opinion on Mila Kunis. I’ve watched a handful of episodes of That 70’s Show, solely because a Whedonverse alum was in it. I found her delightful but irritating as Jackie, and with Seth Green/Alyson Hannigan/Eliza Dushku to draw my attention away, I really wasn’t paying much attention. I also don’t watch Family Guy. Those are the only projects of hers I’m knowledgeable about.

However, she’s a friend of Seth Green’s, and she’s been dating Macaulay Culkin for almost a decade. So she’s got to be good stock, right?

She is my favorite part of this movie, hands down. From the moment she appeared on screen, I wanted to see more of her. She is the absolute opposite of Nina, and she plays the role with so much energy, and life. She took this character and brought her to life.

Considering that the majority of her that we see on screen is some form of hallucination, it’s hard to know anything real about Lily. But she oozes sex appeal. I found her ridiculously sexy, from the jump. Even her dancing was sexy, and so free spirited. When she was on screen, I was watching her and only her.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Winona Ryder. I’m a huge fan of her acting. She picks the most interesting roles (exception: Mr Deeds), and really brings herself to the roles. I’ve loved her since Mermaids. In this film, she gets less than 10 minutes total screentime, only half of that a speaking role, but she leaves an enormous impression.

The hospital scene had me with my hands over my mouth, silently shrieking. I was pretty sure it was a hallucination, but again, was it? Did she really just stab herself? In the face? Then when she appeared again in the apartment and scared the daylights out of me, I was beside myself, jumping out of my skin. Incredible.

The dancing in this movie is intensely beautiful. When I first saw the trailer for this, what I was expecting was close-ups of dancing en pointe, then images of the faces, then far away shots of a dancer doing all the moves. I was unprepared for the fact that these girls are really dancing. Ballet is beautiful and amazing, but it’s hard as hell.

I know as much about ballet as I do any other dancing (read: nothing), but I could tell that Nina was repressed and holding back. I consider that a sign of good acting. Then when Lily comes in, it’s even more obvious. She holds back, and is stiff and uncomfortable as the Black Swan. You know she’s going to pull it off in the end, but waiting for it makes your skin itch.

The sexuality in the film is as intense as the dancing. It’s set up for you in the trailer, but still hits you with an intensity you couldn’t expect. The theater roared with laughter when she turned in the bed and spotted her mother asleep next to her after her first bought with masturbating, but I think that was the last time there was laughter. I can’t recall ever hearing such a silent movie theater. People were enthralled.

The sex scene between Lily and Nina was absolutely incredible. Fast paced and titilating, and then her face changes and it absolutely bitchslaps you. When Lily tells her that it never happened, I was absolutely dumbfounded. Originally, I wondered if Lily was playing with her head and lying about what had happened. As the madness progressed, I grew more and more confused about what was real and what wasn’t. Obviously this was the point of the movie.

The ending was wonderful and beautiful and insane in all the right ways. From the attack on Lily to the final fall, it was perfection from top to bottom. Even in that last moment, I truly thought she had killed her. And when it was revealed she was still alive, I thought there was still someone in the bathroom. When we saw the bloody stab wound in her stomach, I thought that was a hallucination. I had a miserable time telling reality from hallucination. That is what made this movie so incredible. You don’t just watch the madness, you feel it. You feel the unreality of it all.

The dancing was gorgeous. When she transformed into the Black Swan and overtook the stage, I sat up in my chair to watch it. She truly transformed, and the cold hard bitch was gone.

I wish I had seen this movie with someone who could have appreciated it. Rachael didn't get it, and saw it mostly as a scary movie that she didn't understand. She said maybe we should have seen Yogi Bear instead. That's just painful.

I cannot say enough about this movie, and I truly feel I didn’t do it justice with this blog entry.

A blog entry that took almost two weeks, I should mention.

Thank you, Pop Culture

2010-11-25T19:47:00.013-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. It’s been a long day, with a little too much food and a little too much family bonding. I’m thankful for them, my friends, and my jobs.

That’s all very boring, though.

So here is my Top 10 List of Pop Culture Items I’m Thankful For.

10) The Women of Reality TV

I don’t watch a lot of reality TV. I get pretty close, with Top Chef and Project Runway, but I stopped watching The Real World after the Hawaii season, and Survivor has never been my bag. But it doesn’t take much to suck me into a reality program that features train wrecks. If it weren’t for shows like Real Housewives of New Jersey (“Prostitution WHO-AH!”), Bad Girls Club (“Pop off, Son!”), and Flavor/Rock/Shot of Love (“I think I’m falling in love with you!”), I would not realize how utterly and completely normal I really am. I? Am a good person.

9) Mean Girls

Oh, Mean Girls. How do I love thee, let me count the ways. This movie is better than it should be. By definition, this movie should be a shallow chick flick that is barely worth a first glance. Lindsey Lohan (1) in a high school film (2) about popular girls (3) who are mean. She seeks revenge (4) by joining them, and ends up becoming one of them (5). Five reasons to ignore this. Yet I’ve seen it over and over, and never miss an opportunity to break out a quote.

I have bonded with three of my coworkers based solely on this movie. It’s a brightly colored, hilarious movie with a cast that works so well together, you wonder why they aren’t all cast in the same movies over and over. Thank you, Mean Girls.

8) Johnny Depp

Oh, Johnny.

There are some actors that are so handsome, they make my breath catch, my heart race, and my nipples hard. Then there are actors that are such phenomenal actors that you could stick them in Borat and it would become a palatable film. Johnny is both of these.

From Cry-Baby to Sweeney Todd, there hasn’t been one movie with him in it that I’ve been disappointed in. It doesn’t matter if he’s playing a Michael Jackson-esque candy maker or an eccentric writer on too much acid, I’ve followed Johnny to all of his projects, and I will continue to do so. Can’t wait for The Tourist, which he stars in with number 11 on this list, Angelina Jolie.

7) The Soup

I was a big fan of Talk Soup with John Henson. Back then, the show mostly covered the daytime talk show circuit. I never had to watch Jerry Springer, or Sally Jesse Raphael. I could just turn on the TV at the end of the week and find out what happened while I was in school. John was fabulous, but it had more to do with the scripted comedy than anything else.

Now we have The Soup, hosted by Joel Mchale, who is my future baby daddy even if he doesn’t know it. I get so much pop culture knowledge from watching this show, I really cannot live without it. The comedy is so great, and so memorable, that when I hear certain phrases in life, I flash back to skits and openers from the show. Examples include “Oprah’s Va-Jay-Jay”, “It’s Miley”, and “Chicks, Man!” This can get awkward, as I laugh at inappropriate moments.

6) Competitive Cooking Shows

I am a cooking show junkie. I hate the one person cooking shows, such as Rachael “Stab Me Now” Ray or Paula “Could My Accent Be Faker” Deen. But when it comes down to the reality cooking shows, I watch almost all of them. Top Chef is an obvious favorite, but Food Network fulfills this need better than any other network. I cheered on Aarti while watching The Next Food Network Star and screeched when Chef Estes was booted from The Next Iron Chef. I watch Iron Chef long enough to see what the secret ingredient is. If it’s fish, I keep going. If it’s some secret Indonesian nut that costs $5,000 an ounce, I am in there.

The best part of these shows is that they make me want to cook. I get hungry, and as I watch them flip, saute, and robot coupe¹, I think, “Pfft. I can do that. Where’s the butter?!” I invariably end up eating peanut butter and jelly, but still. The inspiration is there.

5) The Daily Show

In the same way The Soup is my pop culture informant, The Daily Show is my political. I have a love/hate relationship with politics. I would be in a much better place mentally if I were one of those people who could live with their head stuffed happily in the sand. I blame my friends for my need to know. Watching any of the cable news networks makes my head spin and has me changing the channel rapidly. John Stewart and his Merry Men (and women) take all of the biggest headache-causing headlines, condense them into jokes, skits, and rants, and feed it to me in small, 30 minute bites. I cannot express enough how grateful I am for this show. I would be more grateful if it were an hour long.

4) Twitter

Oh, Twitter. What would I do without you?

Whenever someone I’m talking to tries to break out some “new” information, whether it’s about politics, celebrities, or the newest brand of waffle, I get great enjoyment out of turning to them, raising an eyebrow, and saying, “That didn’t happen.”

“Yes it did!”

“Nope. Wasn’t on Twitter.”

Bitches, if it’s not a trending topic, it didn’t happen.

Not to mention that I can friend as many celebrities as I want on Facebook, MySpace, Livejournal, whatever. But on Twitter? I get actual responses. I will not brag on how many BTVS alumni have been kind enough to respond to me (other than bragging that Eliza Dushku has acknowledged my existence THRICE and Amber Benson remembered me when I met her), but I will say the thrill I get is matched by NOTHING else on the interwebs. YAY for Twitter.

3) Nathan Fillion

No bad can come from being a Fillion fan. And I mean nothing. The man is not only uber fan friendly, he brings light to every role he’s given. Whether he’s a naughty, wicked priest in Buffy, a Big Damn Hero with a firm ass in Firefly, a not-as-creepy-as-it-sounds gynecologist who falls in love with a pregnant patient in Waitress, or a smart-ass writer with a serious yen for space cowboy references in Castle. I fell in love with Fillion preeeetty much from the moment Xander’s eyeball got popped in Season 7 of Buffy. It didn’t take more than one episode of Firefly for me to realize what I’d been missing. I’m making it my goal to meet him someday, just so I can ask if I can squeeze his ass.

I get the feeling he would let me, too.

2) Barney Stinson

I started watching How I Met Your Mother because Alyson Hannigan was going to be in it. I was less than impressed with the show in general, however, my love affair with Barney Stinson began almost immediately.

As the seasons have progressed, Barney’s shtick has never gotten old. The writers have improved upon it tenfold, in fact. Not only has Barney upped the ante on ways to snag women, but we’ve gotten small but poignant glimpses into who he really is. When he and Ted stopped being friends (and he retaliated by banging Britney, of all people), I felt for him. When he and Robin started dating, I truly did root for them, even though I knew it wasn’t going to happen. We love Barney too much as a womanizer. Hell, The Playbook is going to be impossible to top as my favorite episode of all time. Legen…

I hate Ted. Ted is a complete douchebag. I watch How I Met Your Mother for Barney first, Robin second, and Lily and Marshall third. The Ted-centric episodes bore and irritate me.

And the Number One Pop Culture item I’m thankful for this year:

1) Joss Whedon

This one should be obvious, seeing how much I love and adore every project Joss gets his hands on. I’m planning on actually watching The Avengers, a movie I would never see without the intervention of someone else. I’ve worshipped at the altar of Whedon since my early Buffy days, and I don’t plan on stopping anytime soon.

However, Joss doesn’t make number one simply because he created my favorite shows which are all ended now. He’s number one for this. His reaction to the movie reboot of my beloved show, his baby. I cannot believe how calm and cool he is being, especially considering what happened LAST time someone tried to take his characters and rework them to their tastes. (Original Buffy, anyone?)

Joss is a class act, beyond worthy of the miles of respect (and yes, worship) heaped upon him by his fans. It’s moments like these that make me grateful to call myself a Whedonite.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.

1. Thank you, google. ^

Dobby never meant to kill. Dobby only meant to maim. Or seriously injure.

2010-11-20T20:52:00.009-06:00

Hey, remember me? I was abducted by aliens back in September, and am just now getting back to earth.

No, not really. In all reality, I’ve been watching nothing but shitty TV lately, and haven’t had much inspiration for a blog entry. However, today is November 20th, which means…

HARRY POTTER DAY HARRY POTTER DAY HARRY POTTER DAY!

This will most likely end up being a two-part blog entry. I saw the movie today with TBF and her hubs (who postponed a childless date “night” Friday to see it because I couldn’t go with them), and on Wednesday I will be seeing it again with a friend who is coming in from out of town. I’m thrilled beyond words at getting to see a HP movie in theaters twice, as I still have not seen HBP more than the one time in theaters.

My thoughts are odd and confused, much like the movie. Please understand my warning, which is SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS.

I’ve been anticipating this movie for months. Longer. Pictures have been leaked for so long, including ones of the epilogue scene. I avoided written spoilers, but soaked up the screenshots like a sponge. The promotional poster was released, and I fell all over myself. The first trailer premiered, and I all but creamed my panties.

So thirty minutes before the movie started, I was propped up in the movie theater, with candy and nachos and a thermos of cheese in my bag and a big bag of popcorn and a big coke between the three of us. We were ready to do this.

I hate myself a great deal for my original reaction to this movie, which is that it was a let down. It’s really not. What is a let down is reading the final book, which is incredibly thrilling, intense, and touching, and then seeing half of it on film. It feels not only unresolved, but also schizophrenic in the delivery. There wasn’t a real center to the movie, nor was there a beginning and end. It was build-up with no release.

Having gotten that out of the way, the movie itself really is very good. If I had not read the books, I would probably feel much more positively about it. I can count four tear jerker alerts, and that’s not even counting the various small details, or expectations, that had me sniffling. The action scenes were absolutely fantastic, the landscapes were breathtaking. The cast was as phenomenal as ever. I don’t think there has ever been a miscasting on any of the HP movies. Other than not choosing me to play Dolores Umbridge, a role I desperately would have loved to be British enough to play.

From movie one, I’ve fallen in love with the three lead actors. Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, and Emma Watson are some of the most talented young actors I’ve seen in decades. I’ve got high hopes for the three of them. I imagine they don’t actually need to continue working, as these movies have brought in yacht loads of cash for each of them, but it seems criminal for them not to continue on in other roles. Daniel has a comedic talent that is absolutely mind blowing. Emma’s modeling is fantastic, and though I find her stand offish and rather snobby, her emotional scenes in the movies touched me more than any other cast member, including Radcliffe.

Harry really comes into his own with this one. For the past couple of movies, he acted like a whiney puberty-experiencing git. He’s grown leaps and bounds, and his friends have with him. The maturity of this movie, the gut-wrenching pain they struggle with in every scene, it’s incredible. Looking at Sorcerer's Stone, the growth is just unbelievable. The palpable attraction between Ron and Hermione that’s been going on since Chamber of Secrets is reaching the breaking point here, setting us up nicely for the final movie.

Speaking of relationships, let’s discuss Harry and Ginny. Now, I personally was persuaded to become a Ginny/Draco shipper many moons back by a particularly sassy piece of fanfiction. However, I do not hold HP fandom to the high regard that I do BTVS, so when it comes to being a ‘shipper, I really don’t care. When the Harry/Hermione shippers were shrieking, and the huge kerfuffle over Blaise Zabini being black, I was out of all of that. It actually felt very nice to be on the outside looking in at all of that. But when HBP the book came out, I was, to put it lightly, shocked that Harry and Ginny became an item. For one thing, Bonnie Wright had looked like a 12-year old in every movie she appeared in. It felt dirty. Then the movie came out, and my jaw dropped. I mean, the shoe tying scene? Who taught her that sassy move? And then here, she asks Harry to zip up her dress. TBF and I exchange a serious look over this bit. Isn’t she supposed to be 15? What has Molly been teaching her?

Going back to Harry/Hermione for a moment, I found the dance scene between the two of them here extremely sweet. I was confused as hell when he first walked up to her. As they started dancing, I relaxed, and smiled. It’s one of those moments not consistent with the book that the movie makers throw in to give the characters a break. It’s lovely, and fun.

The first scene in the book to make me cry was the death of Hedwig. I didn’t think they were going to do it here. When Harry let her go, I was disappointed, while at the same time, relieved I wouldn’t feel that pain. And then she came swooping in, and the tears kicked in immediately.

The first movie scene that actually made me cry, however, was Hermione in her bedroom. I don’t know what kicked it off, really. But then she walked up behind her parents and did the Obliviate charm, and my heart just cracked.

I can’t remember everything that set me off. But it didn’t take much. The knowledge that this is the second to last movie was painful. Plus knowing what was coming warned my tear ducts to kick into overdrive.

I was seriously irritated that I was cheated out of a crying scene, though. They’re in the Lovegood house. Xenophilius has walked out. They’re muttering to each other. I’m sitting in my seat, waiting for them to look up. And I’m waiting. Waiting. Waiting. They reach the stairs, and I wanted to shriek, “JUST LOOK UP FOR FUCK’S SAKE WAS IT REALLY THAT MUCH OF AN IMPOSITION TO PAINT THE CEILING GOD I HATE YOU HOLLYWOOD.”

One of my favorite smaller points in the book was the painting of her friends on her ceiling. And they cheated me out of it. Like it would’ve hair lipped them.

It cannot be a surprise that Dobby’s death was the part where I cried uncontrollably. It broke my heart in the book, and from the moment Dobby burst through the door, clinging to Mundungus, I started getting pangs. TBF’s hubs and I have discussed at length how the movie makers have completely ignored Dobby for five movies now, which is completely irritating because I understand why, yet still hate it. They did a better job with this than they did with Sirius, where they ignored him for the better part of Goblet of Fire, then attempted to shove in as much bonding as possible with Order of the Phoenix, making it unnatural if you hadn’t read the books.

Dobby gets the funniest line in the movie, he gets the real hero scenes, and he gets the greatest death scene in any of the books, save the big ones in the next film. Dobby was so sweet and innocent and brave and hearing him say how happy he was to be in a beautiful place with his friends was just…well, I’m tearing up again, so that should tell you something. My popcorn got extremely soggy during this scene.

I’m not going to lie, I absolutely love the Death Eaters. I like to say I’m a Gryffindor, but seriously, I would completely be sorted to Slytherin. Lucious Malfoy was a favorite until he became a sniveling little ponce, but Bellatrix has my heart. It doesn’t hurt that Helena Bonham Carter will play me in a movie someday, as no one else conveys Batshit Crazy like she does.

She only gets…what, two scenes in this movie? I have to sate myself with that, because I know we get some greatness with her in the next movie. I hope they don’t trim her down to nothing more than the main scene. Her torture of Hermione made me squirm, and when she screamed after seeing the sword, I shriveled in my seat. The lady knows how to get a reaction from her audience.

I liked Draco better in the first four movies. He’s become a shell of the evil little spoiled brat I adored in those movies. I realize he’s got Big Bad Conflict, but he’s just…boring.

They did a really great job matching this movie up with the first part of the book. Words cannot express how happy I am that they chopped the forest section down to what it became. That part of book seven made me weep tears of blood, with all the walking. And walking. And walking. Here, it felt tedious, but ended quickly enough for my taste. The break-in at the Ministry was beautifully done, and I was especially titillated to see Umbridge again. I don’t know why I adore seeing her character so much. She’s so evil it makes my skin vibrate, but there’s something about the combination of that voice, the pink, and those kittens. Just a really fabulous movie villain. The “Magic is Might” statuary was also incredible.

I was worried about Godric’s Hollow. I really worried they were going to screw that part up, but it was fantastic from start to finish. From Harry breaking down at the graves to Nagini’s appearance, I was thrilled with it all. I was also happy when TBF turned to me and said, “Did she just speak Parsel tongue?” The non-reader’s picking up a thing or two.

As I said before, I’ll have more thoughts on rewatch. I know I’m missing things.

Last thing, let’s discuss the movie trailers.

Green Lantern - I am not a comic book girl. I’ve wanted to be in recent years, but comics are like Dr. Who. You can’t just jump in anywhere. There’s background to deal with. So I have absolutely no point of reference. But Ryan Reynolds is a fairly decent actor, so I think he’ll do a good job here. In a movie that I will most likely never watch. The trailer was amusing, though.

Red Riding Hood - I had not heard about this film, which shocks me, since Gary Oldman and Amanda Seyfried are two favorites of mine. As intriguing as the premise is, they lost me immediately with five words: “From the director of Twilight”. Yeah.

Kung Fu Panda 2 - OMG! Yes, that was my reaction, in its entirety. The theatrical trailer is a real treat. I look forward to this one.

Yogi Bear - Ugh. That was my reaction to this one in its entirety. Really, Dan Akroyd? You’ve been in so many good movies it’s ridiculous, yet you pick this piece of garbage? And Timberlake, don’t make me take back the small bits of affection you garnered from me with Alpha Dog.

Tron: Legacy - I just…don’t get it. I really don’t. I love that Olivia Wilde has a bob in this, and it’s all…neon. But…what?

I’m just conflicted with this. I hope that rewatch will clear things up for me.

Go. Yay. Rah.

2010-09-18T19:30:00.002-05:00

As I’ve mentioned several times over, I follow my Whedonverse people to whatever projects they choose. This has led to goodness, and it’s led to awfulness.

Enter the CW’s Hellcats.

When it comes to the projects DB Woodside picks, it’s always a toss-up. He was on Buffy, first of all. He also did an incredible job as a pedophile on CSI, which is horribly upsetting because he’s so goddamn sexy. But he was also on HawthoRNe and Viva Laughlin. Like I said. It’s a toss up.

I hate pretty much every show on the CW. It’s really gross the type of programming they use. I miss the WB. Which…Dawson’s Creek. I shouldn’t miss the WB. But between One Tree Hill and Gossip Girl and all that rot, the CW is pretty much dead to me other than ANTM.

I saw the previews for Hellcats, and thought, “Enh. Bring it On in a television show. Fuck that.” Then it showed up on DB’s IMDB page, and I had kittens. Fuck me, I have to watch this. I waited until my DVR had scooped up two of them before I gave it a shot.

This show makes my eyes roll so much I look epileptic. The plot is trying to be deep and failing miserably. The deep Full House moments are so contrived and ridiculous. Ooh, bitchy cheerleaders! Oooh, super perky happy cheerleaders! How innovative!

Of course, then this walked on my screen.

Well. When you put it that way.

The choreography, which would be something to make me watch the show on its own merits (you know, if I was brain dead), is actually incredible. The moves are modern, and more hip hop than cheerleader, which I have a deep appreciation for.

So, because I’m stuck watching it for DB, I won’t be complaining.

As much.

Go team.

Born In Blood

2010-09-13T18:32:00.006-05:00

In the header of this blog, I made sure it stated that there would be spoilers in these entries. As someone who has both sought out and viciously avoided spoilers, I know what it is to find one that is so juicy and fulfilling it makes you tingle with anticipation or shriek with annoyance at knowing what is going to happen.

Please make no mistake. If you have not seen the fourth season of Dexter? You do NOT want to read this entry. Close it quietly, get thee to Best Buy, Netflix or your local library, and pick up the set. It’s 12 episodes, you will watch them so quickly it will make your head spin.

Did you do that?

Welcome back. You may proceed.

I’ve been looking forward to Season 4 of Dexter for quite a long time now. I’ve been with the show since episode one, mostly due to Julie Benz’s presence. However, even if she wasn’t in there, I would’ve given it a shot. I have a thing for serial killers, and the premise of a serial killer who works for the police department while hacking and slashing in his spare time was just too good to pass up.

Note: I read Darkly Dreaming Dexter after Season 2 of Dexter. I can safely say, don’t read it.

I’m sad to say that while I follow Julie Benz to every project she does (including shitty Lifetime movies), I am not a particular fan of her acting. She picks fabulous roles, but I cannot stand the way she emotes, or the pitch of her voice. Even on Buffy and Angel, the breathiness of her Darla voice made my hair stand on end.

In this show, her part has always been the part my eyes blur during. This includes all scenes with Astor and Cody. Cute kids. But I could care less about their role in the plot of things.

That changed this season. All thanks to this little guy.

Don’t get me wrong. I hate kids. I’m not one of those people who get all tingly in their ovary when children are involved. But the idea of Dexter having offspring got my attention last season, and I was really excited to see where they were going to go with it.

And to be fair, I couldn’t stand it in the first few episodes. I mean, are we going to have a full season of Dexter being too tired to enjoy his nightly activities? Yes, yes, you’re in the middle of stabbing someone and the kid needs medicine. Really? Is this going to be the season theme? Because maybe I should just skip to the end.

But Harrison really brought out the humanity of Dexter, and those have always been the best moments of any season. From Season 1, with Dexter curled in a corner sobbing after he killed his brother, I’ve genuinely loved every spot of humanity we’ve gotten to see.

Michael C. Hall is a truly incredible actor. He plays Awkward Touchy Feely like no other actor I’ve seen. It never fails to surprise me when people give Dexter a double glance on occasion, and it really does surprise me that more people don’t. It was nice to see Rita start seeing some suspicious behavior now that they’re living in the same home. But the scenes between them of her suspicion would’ve been a lot more interesting in another actress’s hands.

There was a lot of bullshit filler this season. Astor’s puberty causing her to be a little tweeny bitch, Batista and Laguerta bumping ugly behind everyone’s back, the neighbor macking on Rita. I understand why these little bits needed to be included, but considering just how deep and juicy the A plot was, I couldn’t stop myself from becoming seriously irritated at each interruption.

I don’t even feel the need to touch on any of the bits. I don’t like kids, as mentioned before (and it will be mentioned many times throughout my blog, especially once How I Met Your Mother kicks up again), and bratty teenagers are even lower on my list of things I can tolerate in a television program. I didn’t even like bratty teens when I was a bratty teen. I love Batista as a character, and find Laguerta irritating, so those two hooking up is just baffling. As for the neighbor, I was bouncing in my seat and cheering when Dexter punched him out.

There has never been a villain like Trinity. There has never been anyone who plays a bad guy like John Lithgow. The movie Raising Cane came out when I was 10 years old, and I saw it after it came out on VHS. I have been afraid of Lithgow ever since. He plays creepy sociopath like no one’s business. When I heard he was slated to be on Dexter, my creepy detector started going off. I knew this was going to be 100 times better than Jimmy Smits last season.

I was so far from disappointed. Dear god. From our first scene of him in the bathroom with his victim, I was completely wigged out. Also, what’s up with the naked ass shots? Love you, John, but didn’t need to see that at all. Nice to see a man that comfortable with his pale slightly saggy body, though.

As Dexter got closer to him, it was such an incredible juxtaposition of the two men. You start out thinking, “See, Dexter? You really can have it all. This man is obviously a fucking sociopath, but look how normal his family is!” It’s incredible to see what Dexter could be like in 20 some odd years.

Then the tables flip, and they flip hard. And seeing Dexter completely lose his shit thinking this is what he’s going to be like with his family is so chilling. Arthur is so intense in every scene he is in, he steals each one. Who gives a crap about Dexter, the baby, or Lundy? Trinity’s here.

Speaking of Lundy. I didn’t see his death coming, and I most definitely didn’t see the whodunnit. I really didn’t think it was Arthur, but I couldn’t figure out who else it could be. I actually thought it would end up being a senseless killing with nothing at all linked to the case. I thought that would make a beautifully painful twist. Then when Christine opened the door and said, “Hi, Dad”, I pretty much pissed my pants. I didn’t see that coming, from any angle. And I immediately knew she had shot Lundy and Deb.

Can we discuss Jennifer Carpenter’s acting skills this season? She’s another one I found mostly annoying the past three years. She’s fun, sure. The character of Deb is raunchy and vulgar, and a real go-getter. But I mostly want to claw her eyes out and tell her to STFU. This season? Jesus christ. She moved me more than any other character in the show’s history, including Dexter in any of his more vulnerable moments. When she’s in the parking lot with Dexter, sobbing and flipping out about Lundy being dead. It’s an extremely powerful scene.

I’ve heard people say how creepy it is that Michael and Jennifer play brother and sister, yet they’re married now. I say more brother sister pairings should be married couples. The chemistry these two have plays beautifully for their relationship here. It’s never too heavy handed, they still maintain the strained relationship they have because of Dexter’s lack of humanity. But my enjoyment of their relationship has never been as intense as it was this season. Their final scene, with her telling him what he already knew, was beautifully played on both parts. God, I loved it.

I was, most unfortunately, spoiled for Rita’s death. But I didn’t know details, only that they killed her off in the finale. I would’ve figured it out eventually, given that Julie Benz has gotten another show. Unfortunately, this means I was watching her scenes much more intensely all season. I also questioned who would be the one to kill her. Sure, it seemed obvious that Trinity did it, but the problem was the obviousness. There were so many different scenarios that could’ve played out. But when she left the house to go to the airport (or wherever), I pretty much knew she was going to come home for some reason and he was going to kill her. I also thought he would say something while Dexter had him strapped down. Makes it all the more evil that he didn’t.

I was holding my breath after he walked into the house. I was very impressed with the show’s music crew for not having any ‘DUN DUN DUN” music when the voicemail said she had to come back for something. Even when the phone started ringing in her purse, they kept the normalcy going. It wasn’t until the baby started crying that your skin started to prickle.

When Dexter rounded the corner and saw Harrison sitting in the huge puddle of blood, I got chills all over. It was absolute perfection. Rita in the bathtub full of blood up to her neck was so intense. And Michael C. Hall played it beautifully. There were no hysterical tears, no grabbing her up and clutching her to him. It was almost clinical, yet you could feel the horror and sadness. And he scooped up the baby and ran out of the room, clearly seeing the juxtaposition to his own life.

Best season of Dexter ever. They will never top this, I don’t care how good Season 5 looks.

America’s Next Top Model Round Up

2010-09-05T18:57:00.006-05:00

I mentioned during the 30 day TV meme that ANTM is my guilty pleasure show. It is also one of those shows I’m deeply ashamed to be a fan of.

I started watching during Season 5 reruns. No, I do not call them “cycles”. It’s a TV show, not Tyra Banks’s menstrual flow. I caught up on all of the reruns, and thought, “What a fabulous show! I can’t wait to watch more!”

By season 7, I was irritated. By season 9, I was confounded. Now, I just really hate it. Mostly for Tyra’s presence. I watch the show now solely for the photo shoots and bitch drama.

The new season starts on Wednesday. To commemorate that, I decided to do Top 10 Models from the last 14 seasons.

14 seasons? Seriously? Goddamn.

Without further ado.

10) Sundai Love - Season 13

Who doesn’t love the shortie cycle’s pocket sized model? This “petite” season was so utterly convulted and false. ANTM spent 12 seasons telling girls they were too short, they should never take off their high heels, and then all of a sudden, yay for midget power! Please. Next she’s going to have a plus sized season.

Sundai was by far and away my favorite model this season. Considering that we had such adorableness as Laura and Jennifer in this season, that’s saying something. But between her manly voice and her need to over-accessorize, it was horrible when she finally got the boot.

The winner of her season was Nicole. Nicole of the stoned voice and zero personality. Stupid.

9) Kim Stoltz - Season 5

Yeah, she was kind of a brat. But she was extremely snarky and sarcastic, and that’s my favorite character trait in a human being. This was the first season without Janice, and with that horrible automaton Twiggy. Janice’s presence was desperately missed. But Kim made up for it.

The girl could model. I still do not understand why she was kicked off. Some of her pictures were not as stellar as some of the other girls (see below), but the picture that got her booted was not bad enough to get her removed from the competition. I blame Twiggy for her removal. Then again, I blame Twiggy for all the badness that happened in the seasons she was involved in. Kim was awesome.

8) Elyse Sewell - Season 1

Season 1 was actually pretty amazing for a first season of a reality show. The photoshoots were basic but fabulous. The girls’ quarters were nice, but not over the top. Tyra Banks hadn’t had the Stepford Wife chip implanted in her head yet, and actually cared and focused on helping the girls learn how to be proper models. The girls, however, lacked in the most severe sense.

But Elyse was the star of the season. I love the girls who are too smart for this show, and she was the pioneer of that. When she spoke, the judges would essentially stare at her with a “Buh duh buh duh buh duh” look on their face because they were nowhere near intelligent enough to understand what she was saying.

Her modeling skills speak for themselves. She’s still a very successful model. Remind me again, what is Adrianne Curry doing with her life these days?

7) Dionne Walters - Season 8

Dionne was the only shining light in an otherwise horrendous season. The girls were boring, and not very attractive. They brought the drama times 10, which is always nice. But their personalities were like cardboard. Bitchy, bitchy cardboard.

Enter Dionne. She started out with personality, as the dental hygienist thinking about modeling while cleaning teeth. She always had something smart ass to say, and she was hilariously funny. I still mimic her “What the hay-ell??” in real life.

The judges’ reasoning for kicking her off was ludicrous. You’re going to wait until the third-to-last photo shoot to tell her she scowls too much? That information might’ve been more useful a month prior. And don’t even get me started on the final two being Jaslene and Natascha. You’re telling me Danielle’s accent was too horrible for Cover Girl, but those two horrible girls were perfectly understandable? I call bullshit.

6) Kahlen Rondot - Season 4

Sweet Kahlen. You’ve become kind of a freak since you left Top Model. I’d appreciate it more if you did it publicly and shamed the show. But I have respect for it, same as Shandi from season 2.

Kahlen claimed she’d never seen an episode of ANTM before she tried out for the show. Yet on first meeting Janice Dickinson, she was scared. Yeah. Doubtful. But still, she rocked it on the show. Her photoshoots were fantastic, providing some of the most insanely beautiful photos. She far and away outshined the other girls, including the victor, Naima. Kahlen should’ve been the victor. As always, Janice Dickinson was right in her choice for who should have won.

But along with that, Kahlen was fun. I mean, the girl did the robot. How can you not love that? She was hilarious, and rather snarky. But she was also kind, and thoughtful. When her friend died during the season, she was absolutely destroyed, but she fought it. She didn’t whine and cry about it to Jay, or the judges. She held it in, and fought with quiet strength. Loved her.

5) Nik Pace - Season 5

Another case of a runner up being completely robbed. This is a running joke on the show at this point. Nik was fantastical, to quote Miss Jay. Similar to Dionne, the judges waited until nearly the end of the season to inform her they were tired of her only being photographed in profile. If Tyra had noticed this before, she should’ve spoken up. Those profile pictures were still more gorgeous than the other girls, straight on or not.

The only reason Nik didn’t win Season 5 is because of that stupid waste of hair Twiggy. She was the brand new judge, and Tyra was so busy sucking her ass, she didn’t want to go against her “favorite”, which was the whiney wet blanket Nicole. Janice would’ve chewed Nicole up and spit her out far earlier in the season.

Nik was ROBBED.

4) Tocarra Jones - Season 3

Oh, Tocarra. I was rooting for you so hard. Mind you, I watched Season 3 strictly through reruns, so I already knew who won (see below), but I wanted Tocarra to make it through to the end. That confidence, that insane personality. Plus, the woman is insanely gorgeous. The boobs alone, people.

But she got beat down. Not just by Janice, but by everyone. And it wasn’t right. The girl could model. But it’s hard to model when every other person is telling you you’re a fat ass who’ll never make it. She was one of the saddest eliminations the show had.

3) Heather Kuzmich - Season 9

Heather was the best ratings grab Top Model ever produced. The only reason Heather was cast on the show was because of her Aspergers. Same as Wendy in Season 5 for her Katrina story, and Isis in Season 11 for being transgender. Unlike those two, Heather just rocked it.

You didn’t need to be autistic to appreciate Heather. She was awkward, but hilariously funny, and just wonderful. You couldn’t help but root for her as she rocked photo shoot after photo shoot. When she won the challenge to meet Mary J Blige, and talked of being a “fangirl”, she solidified my full support for her.

I understand why she got eliminated, but it still sucked so bad. This was the last season they did My Life as a Cover Girl. Probably pissed Tyra off that her favorite, Saleisha, didn’t get it even once. No one could beat Heather, she won each and every time. Even after she was eliminated.

2) Eva Marcille - Season 3

The only ANTM winner that I was rooting for. Not because I didn’t want someone else to win, not because she was the lesser of all other evils. But because Eva the Diva was awwwwesome.

From minute one, you couldn’t help but love Eva. Sassy and smart, she walked in and owned it. She was, what, 5’6? And unlike all the other short whiney models in the seasons, she worked it. She wore her heels, she posed like she was 6’5, and she rocked every single photo shoot she had.

Along the way, she ostracized every single other model, including Ann, who was quite possibly the worst model in Top Model history. She couldn’t take even one good picture, and she was a dumb hypocritical bitch. Yet Eva stuck by her side, and never talked bad about her. Yet another reason for me to dislike Ann and love Eva.

Eva is also the most successful model, winner or no. She’s modeled for countless different campaigns, and she’s acted in many movies and TV series, including Smallville and Young and the Restless. Work it, bitch.

1) Joanie Dodd - Season 6

No one can take Joanie’s place as #1 in my heart. At the start of Season 6, I was so busy focusing on my hatred for Wendy’s role there (read: Ratings scapegoat. Oh, you poor Katrina baby) that it was hard to focus on any of the other girls. Then with Jade’s dragalicious head in almost every frame, it became even more impossible. It wasn’t until the season moved forward and some of the dead weight was dropped that Joanie was really allowed to shine.

Joanie rocked each and every photo shoot. From the bald shoot to that amazing crumping shot, the naughty housewife and that craziness on the elephant. The girl knows how to work it. She excelled at all the challenges. If you haven’t seen the episode where she runways in those amazing stripper shoes, look it up. She walks like she was born in those shoes.

This was the first season I watched as it aired, and when Danielle won, I screamed my bleeding head off. Joanie was robbed. I know she’s currently co-hosting Run My Renovation, and she’s cute as a button on it. I hope she continues to get work and stays in the limelight.

Alright, Season 15. Bring on the new bitches. I know I will hate them all.

September 2, 2010 (90210)

2010-09-02T20:11:00.003-05:00

I was born in 1982. I may have been a child of the 80’s, but the majority of my pre-adult life took place in the 90’s. And oh, how I was a fan of Beverly Hills 90210.

I started watching because of my sister. She was four years older than I was, and she did everything before I did. She was a fan of Bon Jovi and Nirvana first. She understood what was happening in Dirty Dancing before I did. My sister and I may have one of the worst relationships of any siblings (short of the Menendez brothers), but if it weren’t for her, I might have missed out on a lot of really amazing things that took place in the 80’s and 90’s.

I watched this show religiously. It premiered in 1990, when I was eight years old. So obviously, I did NOT understand what the hell was going on. I knew two things.

One: Dylan was HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT.

Two: Brandon was HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT.

Yes, I was eight. I was very mature for my age. Dylan was going to fall in love with me once I got to California.

Those were the only boys on the show I thought were cute. David Silver was too nerdy (does everyone remember when David was a nerd, and not the cool guy banging Donna?), and Steve?

I was young, but not blind. I mean, really? Not just a mullet, but a CURLY PEROXIDE BLONDE mullet? No, thanks. Really.

As for the girls, I loved Brenda. Shannon Dougherty may have been a crazy bitch in real life, but she will always be Brenda for me. A good girl who wanted SO badly to be a bad girl. Mind you, I wanted to rip her hair out and scratch her eyes out every time she got close to Dylan, but still. LOVED HER.

I hated Kelly. Kelly reminded me of the girls in school who were mean to me, and thought they were too good for everyone. I liked when bad things happened to Kelly. Donna was boring. I understand why she and David got together. They were both boring.

Once the gang graduated high school and Brenda “left for Paris”, I stopped watching. I saw a handful of episodes of the later seasons, and then once SoapNET started airing reruns I caught even more. Emma Caulfield (Anya from BTVS) played a big part in Season 6, so I watched those episodes. But I couldn’t tell you anything major about those plot lines.

The episodes/plot lines I remember most vividly:

Brenda attempting to dye her hair blonde to get Dylan’s attention.

I remember it turning a really horrendous shade of orange. And as she jogged on a main road in the world’s most tragic tank top and early 90’s shorts, Dylan came by (maybe on his motorcycle?), and they flirted about how he liked blondes, brunettes, and girls in tank tops.

David’s friend shooting himself.

Can’t remember the kid’s name. I know he was very blonde. And he and David were in his father’s study, and he pulled out the gun and accidentally shot himself. Oh, the trauma. A Very Special Episode of BH 90210.

The slumber party

There was an episode where all the girls were sleeping at Donna’s house, including Andrea when she was still uber nerd and not friends with anyone. Kelly’s bitchass cousin was there, and they played Skeletons in the Closet. And, of course, everyone had some deep horrible secret to share, and somehow Bitchass Cousin knew about all of them. There was ice cream with popcorn in it, which is still such a disgusting idea to me. That was another VSE.

The pregnancy test

Don’t know how soon after the first time Brenda and Dylan (gasp!) Did It. But her parents were separating their trash for recycling (green before its time), and found an empty pregnancy test box. I don’t remember any details from that episode, but I remember thinking how glad I was my parents weren’t recyclers. (Again, I was 8. What was wrong with me?)

The stolen car

This goes along with the slumber party episode, I think. I’m pretty sure it was. Where Steve and Brandon got fake IDs to get into a club, and met two “hot chicks”, who promptly stole Steve’s car.

If pressed about episodes, those are the ones I remember.

Happy 9/02/10 day, everyone.

Movie Meme Day 30 - Cleaning out my tear ducts

2010-08-30T22:21:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 30 - Saddest death scene

I was going to use a different scene, because I had already mentioned this scene in the TV meme. But the only other scene I could use that makes me cry consistently each time is from Fried Green Tomatoes, which I already used as an answer previously.

This rips out my heart. Not just because it’s Book dying, but because of Mal’s reaction. His heart is breaking, but he’s trying to stay the strong captain. And Book is still messing with him, telling him he doesn’t have to listen to him.

I cry each time. Wash also dies, but it’s so fast, it’s so shocking, and you immediately run into the giant battle, and it’s hard to absorb that he’s gone. It’s heartbreaking, yes, but nowhere near as hard hitting as this one.

“I’m not one of your crew.”

Sniffle.

Movie Meme Day 29 - You’re watching that AGAIN?

2010-08-29T21:53:00.002-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 29 - Movie you have watched more than ten times

Favorite guilty pleasure movie? Check.

Favorite movie villain? Check. Movie that makes you laugh every time? Check. Movie that makes you cry every time? Check. Best scene ever? Check check check check. Thought you wouldn’t like it and were wrong? Check. Soundtrack/Background music? Check. Movie Cast? Quote? Check. Check. Check.

Yeah. I’ve seen Cruel Intentions a few times more than 10. Like 10 times more than 10.

This movie came out in 1999, and it still looks modern. The wardrobe is not specific to a certain decade, there’s no teen vernacular to worry about. This movie can be shown in 2019 and I truly believe it would still work.

There is no part of this movie I do not like. There is no part of this movie that cannot be quoted of context and still be amazing. A coworker of mine loved for me to quote Joshua Jackson’s famous line on an almost weekly basis.

Blaine: He used to sneak into my dorm room drunk every night. We'd go at it for a little while, and then, as soon as he'd come, he'd start freaking out. "What are you doing, man? If you tell anybody, I'm gonna kick your ass!" God. The only reason I let him keep up the charade is because the man's got a mouth like a HOOVER!

There’s a line missing in that quote. It also goes missing when I quote it aloud.

I saw this in the theater, when I was a Junior in high school. I promptly made all of my friends watch it, and they agreed that it was amazing. The cast alone is fantastic.

Sarah Michelle Gellar plays a cold ass bitch better than anyone I have ever seen. She is so cool and psychotic in this movie, it makes you wonder about what she’s like in real life.

Kathryn: You were very much in love with her. And you're still in love with her. But it amused me to make you ashamed of it. You gave up on the first person you ever loved because I threatened your reputation. Don't you get it? You're just a toy, Sebastian. A little toy I like to play with. And now you've completely blown it with her. I think it's the saddest thing I've ever heard. So, I assume you've come here to make arrangements. But unfortunately, I don't fuck losers.

Ryan Phillipe goes from the cad to the flawed hero seamlessly. He gets all of the best lines in this movie, and he plays snotty spoiled rich boy with ease. Sebastian is the quintessential player, and I can totally see me dropping by panties for him.

Mrs. Sugarman: Oh! We played backgammon?
Sebastian: Uh huh. You beat me three times.
Mrs. Sugarman: I did?
Sebastian: Yup. Then I fucked your daughter.
Mrs. Sugarman: Excuse me?
Sebastian: I said, would you care for some water?
Mrs. Sugarman: No, thank you.

Reese Witherspoon starts out insanely boring, but by the time Sebastian breaks her heart, you’re crying right along with her. In the scene where she makes faces at Sebastian in the car, I was nearly peeing on myself laughing. I can see her making those faces in real life, and the director asking her to recreate them in the car.

Selma Blair is just…her role is pure comedic genius. I’ve never enjoyed her in a role as much as I loved her in this. I can’t stand her in movies, but she is amazing in this as the witless foible.

Cecile: This sure doesn't taste like an iced tea.
Sebastian: It's from Long Island.

Hmm. I think it’s time for a rewatch now, in fact.

Movie Meme Day 28 - Your taste in movies is abhorrent

2010-08-28T21:27:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 28 - Most over-hyped movie

I seriously question anyone who considers this a good franchise. My reasons are many (many many many), and while I would love to explain it in depth, I have a real book here to read. With real characters. And real plot.

And I’m fairly certain that when those movies get made, girls will be swooning for entirely different reasons.

Movie Meme Day 27 - Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!

2010-08-27T22:40:00.002-05:00

Day 27 - Best villain

There are a lot of incredible movie villains. My first thought actually was Voldemort. Evil, sinister, power hungry. What’s not to love?

But Voldemort doesn’t scare me. Freddy Krueger? In the original movie, oh dear god, yes. But did you see Freddy’s Dead? I rest my case.

A good villain scares the living shit out of me. I want to be so scared that he’s going to come after me that I sleep with my lights on.

Enter Candyman.

The movie came out in 1992, and I saw it not very long after it left theaters. Mind you, I was 10. TEN YEARS OLD. You want to talk trauma?

Have you heard Tony Todd’s voice? Tony Todd could go on Sesame Street and sing about vegetables with muppets and I would still. have. nightmares. His voice is like Barry White possessed by Satan. After Satan got bit by a rabid dog. And then fell down 25 flights of stairs. And landed on a bed of rusty nails.

In the rain.

I am not actually going to watch this video. I refuse. I have to go to sleep sometime tonight, and if I hear him say “Helen”, I will not be able to sleep. As it is, I may have trouble just because I’ve put the thought in my head.

Let’s discuss.

Mouth and body full of bees. BEES. Stingy stingy bees.

Hook for a hand. Not just a weak “Hey, lookie at me, I’m holdin’ a hook.” NO. Bloody stump + hook = hook for a hand.

And the real kicker. I almost put the creepy old guy from Poltergeist as best villain, but honestly, there really was not a villain in those movies. It was just, ooh, the creepy ghosts. However, seeing Poltergeist III at (yet again!) a young age instilled in me a serious fear of mirrors. Thank you, creators of Poltergeist who thought it would be a good idea to have the little girl’s reflection COME TO LIFE AND TRY TO RIP HER THROUGH THE MIRRROR.

You fuckers.

But guess how Candyman comes to life?

Oh yeah. Through a mirror.

I now need to watch Care Bears or Mean Girls or Bring it On and COMPLETELY forget about the sound of Tony Todd’s voice.

Movie Meme Day 26 - Do what?

2010-08-26T19:46:00.002-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 26 - Freakishly weird movie ending

I’m still extremely confused by the ending of Lost Highway. In fact, I’m extremely confused by the movie in general.

This movie came out in 1997. I rented it solely because Marilyn Manson was in it. Let’s just throw the skeleton from the closet right now, I used to be a huge Marilyn Manson fan. I still enjoy the music (pre Mechanical Animals, anyway), but I’m not quite as hardcore as I was then. And to be fair, I wasn’t all that hardcore then, either. No black lipstick and goth gear.

But I was so excited to see this. I mean, the cast on this film. Bill Pullman, Patricia Arquette, Henry Rollins, Robert Blake. These are pretty big names in one movie.

I’d never seen a David Lynch project before this, but I heard he likes to create mind fuckers. So I was very interested.

I watched the movie several times over. And I still don’t understand what the hell it’s about.

One of the summaries from IMDB states:

Fred Madison, a saxophonist, is accused under mysterious circumstances of murdering his wife Renee. On death row, he inexplicably morphs into a young man named Pete Dayton, leading a completely different life. When Pete is released, his and Fred's paths begin to cross in a surreal, suspenseful web of intrigue, orchestrated by a shady gangster boss named Dick Laurent.

Have you seen the movie? That helps exactly none.

Needless to say, the ending to the film resolves nothing. NO.THING. Whatsoever. “Dick Laurent is dead.” Great! We’ve come full circle. What the fuck does THAT MEAN?!

I think the only way to understand this film is to kidnap David Lynch, hog tie him, and force him to sit next to you and explain it, piece by piece.

Movie Meme Days 24 and 25 - It’s good

2010-08-25T21:33:00.002-05:00

Not even gonna bother with excuses anymore.

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 24 - Quote you use most often

Uhhhhhh.

I had a hard time with this one. Sure, I quote movies, but I do it without even thinking about it. And in general, I don’t notice it until someone laughs and says, “Oh, I know that movie!”

But there is a quote that I use a lot. It’s not something that comes up a lot, but, given the opportunity, I will say, and I will say it exactly like Jim Carrey and Morgan Freeman do, in Bruce Almighty.

Be around me long enough, and you’ll hear me say it. Hopefully not with the big buggy eyes.

Day 25 - A movie you plan on watching (old or new)

I honestly cannot remember the last time I was this excited about a film. This includes the other HP films I’ve gone to the theater to see.

This is technically a cheat, because Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows will be two movies. But I’m insanely excited about both of them.

This is really the end. The end of a huge era for everyone who has followed along. Whether that was the people who read the books from the beginning, those of us who caught up somewhere in the middle, or even those who have only seen the movies. Harry Potter means something to everyone who has experienced it. I suspect I’m going to cry more watching these movies than I have reading all of the books and watching the movies combined.

Ryan’s choice of Easy A is also valid. I’m very interested in that movie.

On a final note, today is the 10th anniversary of Bring it On. I’ve already mentioned it once in this meme, and (as always) RyAn summed up the love perfectly. See also this Hit Me With Your Best Shot post, and Ry’s response post.

Cheerleaders are dancers that have gone retarded.

Yet we love them anyway.

Movie Meme Days 22 and 23 - I’m trying here, peeps

2010-08-23T17:04:00.002-05:00

I have no steady employment. I have no money. I have no hope. I have lost the will to blog.

But I am working on it, I SWEAR.

And that’s peeps in the non-Dr. Laura sense of the word.

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 22 - Favorite final scene/line

The first time I watched The Lost Boys, I wasn’t aware that it’s a parody/spoof. My mother, her boyfriend, my sister and I all watched it together. It was dark in her room, and we were scared shitless. It didn’t help that my mother conspired with her boyfriend and he went outside and slammed his hand into the window to REALLY scare the pants off of us.

But come the end of the movie, you’re thoroughly invested, oh, god, oh, god, we’re all going to die…then Grandpa roars in with his truck and kills the vamp. He gets out of the truck, grabs a soda from the fridge, and turns to the gang.

One thing about living in Santa Carla I never could stomach, all the damn vampires..

It’s just…perfect. As are the reaction shots that end the movie. That’s when I should’ve known it’s a humor movie, not a horror movie.

Second runner up for this is Matthew Broderick in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, with “You're still here? It's over! Go home. Go!” Also, see RyAn's entry for Back to the Future. I think his beats mine.

Day 23 - Best explosion or action scene

When I first thought about this entry, I was going to use the destruction of the White House in Independence Day, because to me, that’s still one of the most “Holy shit” explosion scenes ever featured in a movie.

But that’s a cop-out, because really, I’m not all that impressed by explosions in movies. Ooh, you blew up a house. Ooh, you blew up a car. Ooh, you caused a 25 car pile-up. Wow. I’m sure that took a lot of work.

I love beautifully choreographed fight scenes. Not ones that make me think, “Wow, that’s some nice wire harness work going on there.” And especially not ones where I think, “Nice stunt doubles.” I want good choreography that looks like the actors did as much as they could, and got their asses handed to them.

Enter Mr. and Mrs. Smith. I already thought Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were the most beautiful people in the world. Brad I’ve loved since Legends of the Fall, and Angelina immediately won me over after watching Gia. So the fact that the two of them were going to be in an action movie? HELLO.

We’ve already gotten some nice action throughout the movie, some small things that just made me grin. Then the fire explodes in the kitchen, Jane comes flying out, and “Express Yourself” blasts on the soundtrack, and the battle. is. on.

This fight scene is not only amazing to watch, it’s also hilarious. I would’ve loved to have been a stunt double on this, because I can’t imagine not cracking up while fighting. They are just BEATING THE CRAP out of each other, and it’s raw and there’s no wire stunts or even guns involved. It’s all hand-to-hand, and it’s hilarious to watch.

Promptly followed by the required sex scene, which is just…wow. If I weren’t a Brangelina supporter before then, I most certainly was after that.

Movie Meme Day 21 - Theirs is a Forbidden Love

2010-08-21T23:14:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Let’s thank the sexy and amazing Liz for her guest blog yesterday! Liz is amazing and awesome and please go check out her blog. Give her some Guns ‘n’ Roses love, she’ll be yours forever. I haven’t seen Zach and Miri yet, but it’s on my list. I’m glad to know it gets such high praise from someone I respect. :)

Day 21 - Favorite romantic couple

This was a difficult one for me. I dislike romantic movies. I dislike romantic comedies, chick flicks, and all things involving forbidden/lost/long distance/past/insert your own type of love. So I had to strain my brain a bit.

I had no desire to see the Lord of the Rings movies when they first came out. Same thing with the entire Harry Potter series. Turns out a giant chess set won my attention with HP, and Orlando Bloom won me over for Lord of the Rings. TBF’s then boyfriend, who turned out to be a fuckwad, was a huge fan of the series, and insisted the lot of us watch.

I’m a huge fan of Liv Tyler, and she was really the only actor I was looking forward to in this movie. Yes, I know who Sean Astin is, yes, Elijah Wood, but honestly, who gives a fluck? It’s Liv freaking Tyler. Empire Records, for crying out loud.

The relationship between Aragorn and Arwen grabbed my attention from the start. She is so soft and sweet, and he’s so hard and tortured. I mean, this is my perfect couple here. And we get all of the things romantic movies give you. Theirs is a forbidden love, two different ethnicities, warriors, being kept apart, blah blah blah. But really, they’re just hella pretty.

After seeing Two Towers, Fuckwad informed me that in the books, Aragorn and Arwen don’t end up together. He ends up with Eomer. I immediately despised her and wanted to claw her eyes out. I was furious, and swore I wouldn’t watch the third movie. Luckily for me, Hollywood despises literature, and they changed it. Just for me.

I adore this relationship. Other than Orlando Blooms prettiness, it’s my favorite part of the films.

Movie Meme - Day 20 - Best Kiss

2010-08-20T23:12:00.006-05:00

Oh, hi. I'm not your normal bunny. In fact, I don't associate as a bunny at all. Well, maybe after a glass of wine or two...anyway. I've known Bunny for quite some time via interwebz. We're musical soul mates. It's true.

I'm Liz. I like movies. One movie in particular that I happen to love is Zack and Miri Make a Porno. Now, yes, it is an unfortunate title, but that is the plot of the movie and all, so it works.

Like most Kevin Smith movies, it's pretty raunchy. There's fake boobs and simulated anal sex and a fuck fuck here and a fuck fuck there. But underneath it all is a very sweet love story, and I don't know about you guys, but I am a complete sucker for a good love story.

Basically it goes like this: Zack and Miri are BFF. They live together, but they have shitty jobs and are having a hard time paying the bills. Zack comes up with the idea to make some porn, because why not? People love porn and will pay a lot for it. So Zack schemes and schemes and they figure it out and they make the porn. Meanwhile, Zack is jealous of the scene Miri is going to do with another dude and Miri has her own issues with Zack's scenes. But neither of them are ready to acknowledge the feelings they have for each other, even though it's completely obvious to everyone else around them, because they've been best friends for so long.

Inevitably, Zack and Miri have a scene in the porn together. We, as an audience, are ready for them to just do it already, damn it! There's been all this tension building up for half the movie about how they're always there for each other and how they have to stick together and lalala. Finally, they have this ridiculous scene where he's delivering the milk and it's very cheesy porn-like, but finally, they get down to business. He lays her down on sacks of beans (HOT!), and he says, "We'll start kissing on a count of three? Ready? 1, 2, 3, go." And then, THEN, the most amazing Live song starts and they start kissing. It's a majorly hot kiss--so many years and so many lost moments and so many stolen glances have now built up to this kiss. Miri closes her eyes and looks like she can't even believe how hot this is. She grabs his head like she needs him to kiss her to keep on breathing. The Live song only makes this scene even more amazing and intense.

Then they do it. You know, the sex. And that's hot, too, and when it's over, they both look like the wind's been knocked out of them. Their lives are different now. They can no longer deny that they are completely in love with each other.

Of course they try to deny it and there's drama and OH NOES ARE THEY NOT GOING TO GET TOGETHER?! But of course they do because they were meant to be. They were inevitable. And so was that amazing kiss.

So...yeah. I'm going to have to rewatch this movie now. Meanwhile, here is the scene in all its glory. And if you wish to pay me a visit, you can do so here.

Thanks, Bunny!

Movie Meme Day 19 - Whatta cast

2010-08-19T21:44:00.003-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 19 - Best movie cast

How could any movie possibly be higher than Can’t Hardly Wait on the list of best movie cast? I don’t understand how that’s possible, especially for anyone whose teen heyday was the 1990’s.

Before I say anyone else, let’s cover the BTVS alumni featured in here.

Seth Green (Oz) - Kenny
Amber Benson (Tara) - Stoned Girl (aka Banana girl)
Eric Balfour (Jesse) - Stoned Boy (aka Brownie boy)
Paige Moss (Veruca) - Ashley (“Chester Cheatah!”)
Clea DuVall (Marcie) - Jana (“I’m allergic to dancing”)
Nicole Bilderback (Unnamed Cordette) - Ready to have sex girl
Christopher Wiehl (Owen) - One of the guys hitting on Amanda
John Patrick White (Pete) - Tassel Guy

That’s a HELL of a lot of amazing actors, and all but one are background actors.

Jennifer Love Hewitt, who was one of the reining scream queens of the 90’s. Ethan Embry. Lauren Ambrose. Charlie Korsmo, who will always be The Kid from Dick Tracey for me. Along with Seth Green, they are the big players, and they’re huge. Then you have Peter Facinnelli, who I didn’t have a problem with until he signed on for Twilight.

Melissa Joan Hart, Channon Roe, Sean Patrick Thomas, Donald Faison, Jaime Presley, Jason Segel (pre HIMYM), Selma Blair, Sarah Rue, Jennifer Elise Cox, Jerry O’Connell.

If ever there was a stacked cast? This is it. Almost every big named teen actor of that time was in this movie. And rather than just being a movie shoved full of them, it’s hilariously funny and smart in it's own right. It makes you wish this was your post-high school graduation experience.

I’m still rather bitter it wasn’t mine.

Movie Memes Day 17 and 18 - Home again

2010-08-19T00:19:00.000-05:00

I was on an airplane for hour after hour yesterday. Today I was just lazy.

Know what happens when you procrastinate? Someone steals your answers before you can even think of them.

Day 17 - Favorite series of related movies

My first answer was Lord of the Rings. But SOMEONE stole that answer. So I had to use my brain again. Back to the Future? No, I (sadly) hated the third movie. Scream? God, that third movie sucked. Poltergeist? If I think about it enough to see if it’s a favorite, I’ll give myself nightmares. Then there’s Pirates of the Caribbean, which…wait…

Why didn’t I think of that one first?

If it hasn’t been mentioned before, I love Johnny Depp more than I love having a head. And while it was weird as HELL to get used to Orlando Bloom without ice blonde hair and elf ears, he rapidly grew on me. And they are absolutely amazing in these movies. The outer actors, as I think of them, like Keira Knightley, Geoffrey Rush, and Bill Nighy only add to the fun of the entire experience.

A lot of people I talk to didn’t care for the third movie. I loved all of the movies, no exception. I don’t know if the fourth movie has been confirmed yet, but I am ready, willing, and have my drool cup ready.

Day 18 - Favorite title sequence

My mother saw Se7en in the movie theater without me. I don’t think I ever really forgave her for that, because I desperately wanted to see it.

To be fair, I wanted to see it because Brad Pitt was in it, not because I was so blown away by the plot.

This may be the most beautifully fucked up movie ever made. There are many fucked up movies in the world, don’t get me wrong. But this movie is smart, and artistic, and brilliantly written. It’s not your average thriller by a long shot. Despite the fact that this is a seriously gory movie, you don’t see the worst bits. And that’s what makes it so amazing. And the opening title sequence sets that up for you.

I also love the soundtrack, the reverse sound of Closer by Nine Inch Nails. Most people wouldn’t even realize it was the song until Trent Reznor’s amazing voice lurches out “You get me closer to god”. It’s a brilliant opener to an amazing movie.

Movie Meme Days 14 - 16: Blame NY

2010-08-16T16:36:00.006-05:00

I would be able to do this meme daily. I would. If it weren't for Central Park, Renaissance fairs, bagels, 8-inch knives, and watermelons.

There's a story to everything, this blog is not the time.

Day 14 - Favorite film in black and white

I suppose technically this would be considered a cheat, because while Clerks is indeed in black and white, it was also made in 1994, after the point when black and white movies didn't really happen anymore.

But I think the black and white aspect is part of the charm. This really was a group of friends putting together a movie. Kevin Smith is a genius when it comes to movie making (we're going to ignore Jersey Girl for the moment), and as his first movie, it's all you need to convince someone to watch the entirety of his film making career. It's sharp, funny, and in black and white, you really focus on what's being said as opposed to any attempt at flash or special effects. It's stark and just extreme amounts of fun.

Day 15 - Best musical

I'm a music baby. I grew up with music in my house, I've been going to concerts since I was around six years old. I live for good music. Ergo, musicals are heaven to me. I love musicals, and they love me. So I have a lot to choose from. Which means that I'm trying to think of a musical I love more than Across The Universe. I'm failing miserably.

It's Beatles songs. FABULOUS Beatles songs, like "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" and "Happiness is a Warm Gun". Music altered, sung by different people, but still so beautiful as to make you cry, or make you smile. The acting that is built around the songs is also amazing. From the frat boys singing "With a Little Help From My Friend" to Max yelling, "Hey Judie, Judie, Judie Judie Judie" to go along with the lyrics, this movie made me smile so much. And also see above re: crying. "Let it Be" makes me cry on my best day. Set to the scene it is in this movie? I cry just thinking about it.

I love AtU for the same reasons I love Moulin Rouge. Contemporary songs redone, and also amazing scenery and color choices. But AtU squeaks by as my favorite. Just wonderful.

Day 16 - Your guilty pleasure movie

Karen: "I can't go out. ::cough:: I'm sick."
Regina: "Boo, you whore."

Janis: "Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and then just sit around and soak up each others awesomeness?"

Karen: "Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Nobles. And I'm sorry for telling everyone about it. And I'm sorry for repeating it now."

Gretchen: "Oh my God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white."

Regina: "Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen!"

Scary Homeschooling Boy: "And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals."

Gretchen: "Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about Caesar? Hm? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar. And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that's not what Rome is about. We should totally just stab Caesar!"

Regina: "I CAN'T GO TO TACO BELL, I'M ON AN ALL-CARB DIET. God, Karen, you are SO stupid!"

Movie Meme Days 12 and 13: New York State of Mind

2010-08-13T12:06:00.002-05:00

First of all, let's give it up for Lori for so generously guest blogging day 11's meme entry. Lori is the bomb, if you're not reading her blog, get your ass over there.

I was going to post yesterday's blog entry, but I was stuck in an Atlanta airport for literally 5 hours, with a "you have to pay" wifi system that I wasn't feeling. I managed to sneak one hour of time, but any more would've pushed my luck. So, two in one. Also, the next four or five days' worth of entries will be live from New York.

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 12 - Best soundtrack/background music in a scene

I'm not even going to lie. Bring it On is one of my favorite movies. I love the energy, the sass, the sarcasm. I've also discussed my love for good choreography, and a movie about cheerleading is all about the dance and movement.

The soundtrack is fabulous. I don't think there's one song on there I don't like. All throughout the movie you get these great songs, not including the original cheer at the beginning that will get stuck in your head faster than a commercial jingle. Parts of these songs play throughout, and you groove on them without realizing it while watching.

Then, in the final cheerleading scene, all of those songs are mashed together to make up the song they perform to. I was absolutely tickled pink by this. From Blaque's "As If" to Smashmouth's "Freaking Me". It's just a great use of a soundtrack, and I think it made the final performance even more fun to watch.

Love. Love love love this movie. And only 3/4 because Eliza's in it.

Day 13 - Favorite animated movie

This is another one of those that doesn't require a moment's hesitation. I still have the ticket stub from seeing The Little Mermaid in the theater when I was a little girl.

As a little girl, I loved it because Ariel is pretty, the movie is funny, and there's singing. But growing up, the message just resonated so beautifully with me. Who doesn't want to experience something they don't have? There's so much in the world you want to do, and there's always something that's trying to hold you back, and you fight against it.

Ariel didn't want to go to the surface to meet a boy. She wanted to learn. She wanted to know about books and fire and the way humans live. Finding a cute boy was just another thing to motivate her on.

Ursula is my favorite Disney villain. First of all, she's a BBW. Then, she's purple and evil. Oh, she's so much fun.

I got involved with a debate on a favorite website of mine some time back about this movie. A woman didn't like that Ariel has to give up her voice for a boy. She felt it wasn't empowering. I felt she completely missed the point of the movie.

If you listen to the lyrics of Poor Unfortunate Soul, it's telling you right there the anti-message of the movie.

The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore!
Yet on land it's much prefered for ladies not to say a word
And after all dear, what is idle babble for?
Come on, they're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
It's she who holds her tongue who get's a man

So Ariel gives up her voice. And she meets Eric, and he thinks she's so freaking beautiful, but he really can't get into her because he doesn't know who she is. She can't talk to him. Once she gets her voice back and can speak again, he falls in love with her.

It's a fairy tale way to get to the point, but I like those.

I also love and can sing the words to every song on the soundtrack. I had it on a CD when my niece was very very little with other Disney songs, and my favorite one to sing to her while driving was Les Poissons. I did the overly exaggerated French accent, and she loved when I would shriek the "Hee hee hee haw haw haw!" parts.

And then there's Part of Your World, which you can catch me singing at random sometimes when I think no one is around.

Final note: My hairdresser, who diligently dyes my hair dark red as often as I can afford it, has a gorgeous little girl about my niece's age. I've babysat her before, so she knows my name. But hairdresser has another client with my name, as well. So her daughter has a way to differentiate us.

I'm the one with "Ariel hair".

I love my hairdresser's little girl.

Movie Meme Day 11: Kingdom of the Crystal Crap

2010-08-11T22:35:00.006-05:00

Hi. The first thing I should tell you is that this is not your Bunny speaking. Bunny is off being all jet setting hot shit, so instead of Bunny goodness, you get me. Who the hell am I? I'm Lori. I've known Bunny for about a million years, and we like each other. Yes, we like each other like that, too. For all you pervs out there. If you'd like to like me too, I can be found on Twitter. I also blog over at Oh Shit, She's Awake.

But enough about me.

This is supposed to be about Meme. A movie meme to be exact.

Day 11 - A movie that disappointed you.

Oh, Indy.
Why? Why Indy, why?

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull disappointed me more than almost any other. It shook me to my core; it broke my heart. It almost ripped apart the seams of my childhood. I wanted to like this movie. I wanted to like this movie so much that I was willing to forgive the fact that Shia LeBeouf was in it, playing Indy's son Mutt. Yeah, that's right. Mutt.

Shia LeBeouf of the Keanu Reeves school of acting, in which actors learn the fine craft of playing the same character in every film they are in. Seriously. Watch Transformers, then watch Crystal Skull. Same bumbling, idiotic character. Different clothes. Perhaps if they'd have had Shia naked in both movies, there's have been something to look at.

Or more likely, movie goers would have been wondering "where's the LeBeouf." Okay, that was bad even by my standards. But it was about as hackneyed as Shia's performance in Crystal Skull.

Cate Blanchette over-acted and over-accented her way into my "holy shit that was bad" hall of fame with her portrayal of the evil Irina. And that hair. Oh, the hair. Wrong on so very many levels.

Don't even get me started on the whole alien angle.

Aliens? Really?
Why'd it have to be... aliens.

As far as I'm concerned, the only saving grace for this movie was the reuniting of Ford's Indy with his long lost love Marion - played, thankfully, by the original Marion, Karen Allen. The spark from the very first movie was a most welcome sight. The dialogue came easily between the two. Almost like they'd successfully done it before or something.

And most unlike any of the strained and uncomfortable dialogue between any of the other characters.

Don't get me wrong. I still love Indy. I will always love Indy. He's a big part of my childhood. And I still love all of the other movies. It's just that this one was painful for me to watch. Not because the performances were sub-par. Not because the plot was unnecessarily complex.

Not even because Indy's gotten older. Hell, we've all gotten older. That doesn't mean that we can't still go on an adventure and kick a little ass.

What I missed was the sheer, undiluted joy of the first three. The sit back, relax and take me for a ride feeling that came along with the other Indy romps. Hell, even Temple of Doom was better, and that was the weakest of the first three films.

But it still had heart.

Crystal Skull lacked heart.

Maybe the aliens took it.

Stupid aliens.

Trailer for the movie that never really was.... *sigh*

Movie Meme Day 10 - How do you like them apples?

2010-08-10T21:08:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 10 - A movie you thought you wouldn't like but ended up loving

No, TBF. I am not watching Good Will Hunting. Why? Because it looks stupid.

No. No. No. Why? Why would I want to watch any movie with Matt Damon in it? Or Ben Affleck when Kevin Smith’s name isn’t attached to the picture?

No. No. No. Look, I brought other movies for us to watch! Let’s watch Can’t Hardly Wait again! Or Rock of Love, which I despise! Or paint dry!

Please no?

Come ON, I watched Shrek 3 for you! Why must you make me watch movies I don’t want to?

FINE. FINE. But if I hate it, it’s on your head.

Well, that was funny.

Okay, that was sweet.

OMG he is not singing “Afternoon Delight”!

Awwww. That was sweet.

Okay, I’m an idiot.

The best friend lives for me telling her I’m an idiot and she was right. As do I, for the record.

Movie Meme Day 9 - Causing a scene

2010-08-09T22:14:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 09 - Best scene ever

This meme is way harder than the TV meme. I guess I am more movie-minded than TV minded. Unless we’re talking BTVS, of course.

To come up with this, I figured I would run my top 10 list through my head. First movie on the list is Labyrinth, my all-time favorite movie for life. I’ve seen some amazing movies in my life, but none has surpassed it for pure charm, humor, music, and happiness.

There is so much to love in the movie, but the staircase puzzle set to Within You made such a huge impression on me when I was little. I could walk out of the room during any other scene in the movie, but as soon as I heard the opening chords signifying this scene was starting, I would run back into the room.

First of all, the scenery is absolutely incredible. Jareth running up and down the stairs, walking upside down and sideways. Toby appearing upside down, the crystal bouncing up the steps to him. Sarah running all over trying to get to him, Jareth appearing and disappearing. Walking through her, coming up from underneath. Yes, the effects were very 80’s, but they were lovely 80’s. Jim Henson did it up, and he did it well.

If there’s one thing you should learn about me, it’s that I’m a music fiend. So it would only make sense that a musical would be my ideal movie. David Bowie singing in a muppet movie? There is no bad.

From the first moment we see the stairs until she jumps, it’s just a truly, truly amazing scene.

How you turned my world, you precious thing
You starve and near exhaust me
Everything I've done, I've done for you
I move the stars for no one

Movie Meme Day 8 - That is so high school

2010-08-08T21:50:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 08 - Movie that should be required high school viewing

I struggled with this category today. A movie so meaningful that all high schoolers should see it? I’m constantly seeing books that should be mandatory for high schoolers, but movies?

Obviously this would have to be something deep and meaningful, with a strong message. And you know, my brain just doesn’t feel up to it today. Fuck strong message. High school is full of angst, and pain. You’re so busy in your own head trying to fit in, or not fit in. Worrying about bullies or problems at home, or finding your own identity. Why the hell would you want someone telling you, “This is so deep and meaningful you must see it!”

Fuck that shit. Let’s dance.

I had the advantage of having unconventional parents. They were 21 years old when I was born, and they didn’t know what the hell they were doing, so my sister and I got to experience things some kids might be sheltered from for awhile. Rock concerts, R rated movies, etc, etc, etc. And when I was very very young, I got to experience Rocky Horror Picture Show. And while I didn’t in ANY way understand what I was seeing, I loved every bit of it. So much brightness and movement and singing, and dancing. Fabulous. I continued to watch it over and over throughout my life, and as the plot finally started to sink in, I loved it more and more.

Every high school student needs to not only watch this movie, they need to go to a midnight screening and throw toast and toilet paper. If I were a high school teacher, that would be a mandatory field trip.

At the very least, they should all be able to do The Time Warp. The best episode of MTV’s horrid My Super Sweet Sixteen was the granddaughter of the inventor of Spam. Her party was utterly original and unconventional, and she made everyone learn the dance and do it at her party. Brilliant.

Movie Meme Day 7: Why would you do this to me?

2010-08-07T19:38:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 07 - Least favorite movie by a favorite actor or actress

How does one choose Eliza Dushku’s worst movie? I mean, there is an awful lot to choose from.

The best way to work that out, though, is to look at the acting skills. I don’t just love Eliza because she’s the sexiest woman alive. I adore her because she is an insanely talented actress. Who happens to be the sexiest woman alive.

My first go-to horrid movie of hers is Soul Survivors, but she is actually really great in that movie. Her best roles involve her being some form of a badass, and she fulfills that beautifully in that movie. I just have to forget that the plot makes no sense and the acting of everyone else is worthy of eye stabbage.

Then there’s Wrong Turn. Dear god, was that a wrong turn for her career. But she plays horrified hill people kidnap victim very nicely, and she gets to be a bit of a fighting badass.

Open Graves. The Kiss. City by the Sea. I mean, we could keep going. But the movie that really, really shames me to say I’ve seen it because of her is The New Guy.

I had such promise for the movie before I saw it. I mean, Eliza rides a damn bull. And the video of her trying on bikinis made its way across the internet to me, and gave me shiny happy thoughts.

But…have you seen the movie? That is a waste of a good actress if ever there was one. I cannot imagine why she agreed to appear in this movie, though I can understand why the casting director chose her. You want a shitty script to succeed? Put a sexy woman in the main role.

She’s a cheerleader without the slightest bit of sexiness that she had in Bring it On. She falls all over the geeky kid, while playing a balancing act with the asshole boyfriend that she can’t seem to shove to the side on her own.

And the writing is so god awful that her talent as an actress is pretty much gone. If you were to judge Eliza solely based on this movie, I could understand why you would question her being my favorite actress.

Sad. So sad.

Movie Meme Day 6: Something in my eye

2010-08-06T20:41:00.003-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 06 - Movie that makes you cry every time

I love these questions that are quick answers.

I don’t know how old I was the first time I saw Fried Green Tomatoes. It came out in ‘91, and if I saw it then, I don’t think I felt the full impact for many years.

I know I watched it with my mother, because we attempted to cook fried green tomatoes on our own. They did not fair well in our hands.

This movie is so light and funny, while being so heart wrenching with a very severe message all at the same time. This movie covers so many different levels of pain, from severe racism to death and dismemberment. But above all else, it’s a story about friendship.

Anyone who knows me knows just how deeply I cherish friendships. I don’t waste my time with acquaintances. You’re either a very close friend, or you’re just someone whose name I know. If you’re my friend, you’re mine. I will chew through steel bars to protect you. My mama lion instincts come out hardcore for friends. And because of that, this movie drags out all of my tears, kicking and screaming.

The relationship between Ruth and Idgie is my favorite friendship in any movie or television show in history. One could look at it as a lesbian relationship, and yes, I can see that angle. But my relationship with TBF gets transfered onto theirs, so I see it as a gorgeous, true deep friendship.

I was horrified to discover that TBF had never seen this movie. I rented it, and sat down at her house with a box of kleenex between us. And I was not surprised to see her grab one out of the corner of my eye.

My two favorite (heart wrenching) quotes from the movie:

Mr. Percy: Why did you go with Idgie Threadgoode?
Ruth: Because she... she's the best friend I ever had, and I love her.

Sipsey: Miss Ruth was a lady. And a lady always knows when to leave.

I’m tearing up now, in fact.

A beautiful movie, with amazing humor and soul ripping sadness.

Movie Meme Day 5: Burn the reels

2010-08-05T22:00:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 05 - Movie you loathe

Ask me my favorite movie, and I’m going to need a minute to work my thoughts out.

But a movie that I hate? A movie that makes me want to punch the writers, directors, crew, and entire cast?

Yeah, that’s not really a problem for me.

I did not pay money to see There’s Something About Mary in theaters. My mother’s boyfriend rented it well after the fact, and I remember watching it with them, and not laughing even one time throughout the entire film.

This movie was the start of my hatred for all of the actors in it. And when I say I hate them, I mean I really, truly cannot stand the sound of their voice nor the site of their face.

There is nothing amusing about this film. It goes for the stupid jokes each and every time. From the cock and balls stuck in the zipper, to the hair, to the flattened leathery old lady tits. Really? You couldn’t have worked a little harder? Comedies have been around for centuries. If you can’t come up with your own original idea, steal from the best. Don’t throw a bunch of shit together and hope it works.

I despise Cameron Diaz. Her entire persona makes me want to claw her eyes out. Ben Stiller has not been in one decent movie. And Matt Dillon lost any sense of respect I had for him up to this point.

The time I spent watching this movie is time I will never get back. And I’ll never forgive these people for that.

This isn’t the only movie I could’ve chosen from. It actually was a tie between this and South Park: The Movie. There’s also American Pie, though that gets a by because of Alyson Hannigan.

For anyone who anticipated me saying Twilight, I honestly did consider it. However, I said at the beginning that this bullshit would not be discussed at length in this blog. I know eventually that rule will be broken, but not yet. Plus I haven’t seen (nor will I see) the shitty ass movie.

Movie Meme Day 4: What are you laughin’ at?

2010-08-04T19:34:00.003-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 04 - Movie that makes you laugh every time

This one is no contest. From the first time I watched this movie, and every time since, I laugh my coddamn ass off at Liar, Liar.

This movie goes against everything I’m amused by. I hate actors who are overacting hams. Will Ferrell makes my spine ache from his stupidity. I cannot stand Steve Carrell. And in almost all of his roles, Jim Carrey is so overly that I just want to slap him and tell him to knock it the fuck off.

But in this movie, he is absolute perfection. This movie is always my go-to when I’m aggravated, or need a good laugh. The jokes run through my head, and when my mother’s goddaughter was little, we used to do “The Claw” to her, and have her just dying of giggles.

The plot line is fabulous, and so simple you wonder, “Why didn’t I write that?” Not only is it someone who cannot tell a lie no matter what, it’s a lawyer who can’t lie. Brilliant! And he’s a total fucker, which means it’s so deeply ingrained in him that telling the truth is nearly painful.

Jim Carrey does a beautiful job of showing how hard it is for him to tell the truth. The faces that irked me in Ace Ventura were exactly what was needed here. The reactions of everyone around him to his truth telling were also enough to have you peeing on yourself.

There isn’t a down moment. Even when you’re feeling horrible for Max for having such a shitty father, you’re picked back up by the humor.

Some of my favorite moments:

Do you know why I pulled you over?

Here goes: I sped. I followed too closely. I ran a stop sign. I almost hit a Chevy. I sped some more. I failed to yield at a crosswalk. I changed lanes at the intersection. I changed lanes without signaling while running a red light and *speeding*!

Your client knocked over an ATM.

“He needs your legal advice.“
"Stop breaking the law, asshole!”

I cannot tell a lie, but I can write one!

The pen is blue, the pen is blue, the goddamn pen is blue!

Owie!

“What the hell are you doing?”
“I'm kicking my ass! Do you mind?”

I could keep going.

Second runner up to this is the only other overacted Jim Carrey movie I enjoy, which is Bruce Almighty. But my most quoted line from that movie isn’t even by Carrey himself. It’s the entire scene with Steve Carrell, which TBF and I quote constantly.

Movie Meme Day 3: Best Oscar Nom

2010-08-03T22:28:00.006-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 03 - Favorite Oscar-nominated movie from most recent ballot

I neither pay attention to Oscar noms nor watch the Oscars. The most I pay attention to is the fashion on the red carpet. And I don’t even care that much about fashion. So I had to go to my boy with all the knowledge, RyAn, for the list.

It also doesn’t help that I haven’t seen 90% of the movies nominated.

Of the ones I have seen, though, there’s really no contest. I watched Up with TBF and her husband, with my godson crawling around on the floor tangled up in my knitting.

Within the first, what, ten minutes? That movie had me bawling into the couch. Followed rapidly by me laughing my ass off.

There is no badness in this movie. Not only is the plot original and fabulous, the visuals are breathtaking. I mean, the image of balloons exploding from the top of the house alone is a visual orgasm. Then once they get to South America, the woods are so bright and realistic, and Kevin is the most insanely gorgeous creature in any Disney or Pixar movie in history.

The characters are so much fun. As crotchety as Carl is, your heart immediately goes out to him. You saw what he went through, so you can’t fault him for it. The earnestness of Russell is at first rather annoying, but eventually the realization starts to kick in that there’s more going on with this kid’s back story then we’re being told. Once it comes out, it’s all gooey heart melt.

And, of course, we would be remiss if we left out Dug. TBF told me that there would be a line that would make me fall over laughing. The minute Dug stopped mid-sentence and shrieked, “Squirrel!” I almost peed on myself. That is essentially exactly what I do. It’s really bad. And that is what most people take away from the movie, and it’s too perfect.

I personally think this should have won Best Picture. Take that, Oscars.

And if it weren't this one, it would be RyAn's pick, which he summed up beautifully.

Screw Body Fascism

2010-08-03T16:04:00.002-05:00

I knew nothing about Gina Torres’ new show Huge when Whedonesque said it was premiering. As a matter of fact, I learned about it the day it actually was premiering. I don’t know what’s wrong with me that I’m not keeping up with my people the way I used to.

I set my DVR up to record the show, then promptly ignored it. If I haven’t mentioned it 100 times before, I’m picky about the television shows I watch, and I’m very rarely super excited to jump into a new one.

Finally, I watched the first episode last week. Then I promptly watched the remaining five episodes.

I absolutely freaking love this show.

Bypassing Gina Torres for a moment, let’s discuss Nikki Blonsky. I didn’t jump on the Hairspray remake bandwagon immediately. Zac Effron actually is a Whedon alumni (baby Simon in an episode of Firefly), and I’m a John Travolta fan. But it was a remake of a movie I hold near and dear, and how could anyone possibly take the place of Rikki Lake and Divine in my heart?

I actually bawled my eyes out watching Hairspray. I can’t help it, I’m a big beautiful bitch in my own right, and seeing fat chicks win the gold always makes me happy.

Cut to Huge. This show is actually REALLY depressing. Hell, in the first episode we lose a character because of Bulimia. It’s hard to get more depressing than that unless you show someone slitting their wrists after running over their pet kitten while staring at a picture of their dead mother.

The character Nikki plays, Will, is proud of her fat. Mind you, she’s proud of it as a defense mechanism rather than downright love of her poundage. And that’s okay, because this is ABC Family, for christ’s sake. They need to do something to make up for Pretty Little Liars (which I also record, for Bianca Lawson. We won’t discuss that train wreck)

But Will is a smart ass. She’s a “rebel”. She has fatspiration on her bunk, and she sells contraband Twinkies. There is no bad here. She’s snarky and mean spirited, but damaged. How much fun is this going to be?

Gina Torres is one of the top 10 most gorgeous women alive. She’s also a phenomenal actress. I’ve seen her in some truly horrendous roles (Cleopatra 2525, anyone?), but she plays with real integrity and sharp skills. I enjoy everything she does, and she doesn’t disappoint in this. Her stoic nature is brilliant as a camp director, and the quiet pain of dealing with her father and lying to her mother is just…she brought tears to my eyes, I’m not even going to lie.

It’s hard to focus on any of the other campers, just because there are a lot of them and I’m not good with their names. Mostly it’s “The girl who ___” and “The guy who ___”. I know Amber, solely because if I was a camper in this world, I would do everything in my power to make her life miserable because she’s the pretty one. But this is a wonderfully diverse group of actors. And it’s about damn time we saw some pudgealicious people on television.

I particularly enjoyed when, in the second episode, the bitchy girls squealed and giggled about the book that was an obviously thinly veiled reference to Twilight, then later in the same episode, the awesome girl (Becca, so says IMDB) is quietly reading Hunger Games. Now, I could cry foul that attention was paid to a rip-off of that shitty tripe. But then I realized, Twilight was never mentioned by name. Instead, the stupid girls are shown loving it. And the smart and lovely girl is shown reading the actual book. Awesomecakes.

That happiness was destroyed when two episodes later they watched the movie based on that book. But I rather enjoyed that the fake version was as cheesy and horrible as its basis.

More people need to be watching this show. It’s so enjoyable, and I truly hope it continues for many seasons.

Movie Meme Day 2: Why haven’t you seen this?

2010-08-02T23:26:00.001-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 02 - Movie that you think more people should see

It never ceases to shock me when I find out someone hasn’t seen Office Space.

Admittedly, I came into the game late myself. I only saw it about four or five years ago. After watching it, I was horrified that it had taken me so long.

This movie puts the cult in cult classic. The humor is brilliant, but with enough slapstick goofballness to keep the less academically minded (like me ::cough::) happy.

Ron Livingston is amazing as Peter. From the beginning, with his hatred of the drone lifestyle, to his realization that he doesn’t have to follow the same dreadfulness day in and day out. And in a series of events that would never happen in real life, his slackerness leads to praise and protection.

Each of the characters in supporting roles are perfection, but of course the greatest (and most quoted) one is Milton. People know the classic stapler line without even having seen the movie. You can quote him completely out of context of the movie and people will be amused.

I’m not a Jennifer Aniston fan, so I choose to tap dance around that subject. She was fine here.

But the quotes from this movie are ridiculously keepable. As with all cult classics, it’s a situation where, when someone quotes the movie, there’s an audible gasp and the exclamation of, “You’ve seen Office Space, too!”

I think this should be one of those movies that did so good in the movie theaters that it lasted there for months, then sold massive amounts of VHS and DVDs. As it is, I think this movie is on the $5 rack.

Which means everyone has a reason to buy and watch it.

Movie Meme Day 1: Sequels That Suck

2010-08-01T22:20:00.003-05:00

31 Day Movie Meme

Day 01 - Sequel that should not have been made

There is SO much to choose from with this category. Bring it On Again (and again and again). Cruel Intentions 2. Wild Things (same plot, 4x more tits). But my brain actually picked this out first.

I am a huge fan of The Crow. In 1994, I was 12 years old, and this movie was god for me. I mourned Brandon Lee’s death, because he was absolutely incredible in this movie, and we would never get to see that talent (or, let’s face it, that face) in any other roles. It didn’t help that all of the interviews done with him talked of how this movie was his destiny. That’ll break a 12 year old girl’s heart faster than you can say “Damaged boys are sexy”.

In 1996, The Crow: City of Angels came out. My 14 year old brain was absolutely HORRIFIED that they would even think of making a sequel to a movie where the main actor died. However, since it was a sequel to a movie I loved, I made plans with friends to see it. I almost vomited up my popcorn.

I heard they were making YET ANOTHER ONE, and I vowed never to see it. I didn’t care if Johnny Depp was the main character, I was NOT GOING TO SEE ANY MORE CROW SEQUELS.

Those motherfuckers went and put Boreanaz in one. And of course, me being the stupid Whedonite I am, I caved. Eddie Furlong was not a selling point, despite Terminator 2/Pet Cemetary 2 love. He did not age well. Also, what’s with him and the sequels?

I found out while looking up dates on IMDB that a television show was also created. Apparently it lasted -1 seasons. As well it should. I’m ignoring the rumors I hear that they are remaking the original movie.

Hollywood needs to leave well enough alone. Back off the sequels and for cod’s sake, STOP remaking things. Unless it’s Tim Burton, who has permission from me to remake anything he damn well pleases.

Except The Crow, with Johnny Depp. As already stated above.

31 Day Movie Meme

2010-08-01T12:34:00.007-05:00

Blame RyAn. Also, thank him for my ass kicking header image. I'm the only one to be blamed for the horrendous color scheme. I suck at color schemes.

But considering how long it's taking me to write the 800 entries I have in my head, I guess this is a good thing that there's (da da da da!) another 31 day meme.

The 31 day movie meme!

Day 01 - Sequel that should not have been made
Day 02 - Movie that you think more people should see
Day 03 - Favorite Oscar-nominated movie from most recent ballot
Day 04 - Movie that makes you laugh every time
Day 05 - Movie you loathe
Day 06 - Movie that makes you cry every time
Day 07 - Least favorite movie by a favorite actor or actress
Day 08 - Movie that should be required high school viewing
Day 09 - Best scene ever
Day 10 - A movie you thought you wouldn't like but ended up loving
Day 11 - A movie that disappointed you (Guest blog by Lori)
Day 12 - Best soundtrack/background music in a scene
Day 13 - Favorite animated movie
Day 14 - Favorite film in black and white
Day 15 - Best musical
Day 16 - Your guilty pleasure movie
Day 17 - Favorite series of related movies
Day 18 - Favorite title sequence
Day 19 - Best movie cast
Day 20 - Favorite kiss (Guest blog by Liz)
Day 21 - Favorite romantic couple
Day 22 - Favorite final scene/line
Day 23 - Best explosion or action scene
Day 24 - Quote you use most often
Day 25 - A movie you plan on watching (old or new)
Day 26 - Freakishly weird movie ending
Day 27 - Best villain
Day 28 - Most over-hyped movie
Day 29 - Movie you have watched more than ten times
Day 30 - Saddest death scene
Day 31 - Scene that made you stand up and cheer

My tongue is going, soon I'll be of no use to you at all

2010-07-20T23:16:00.006-05:00

I haven’t updated this blog for a few reasons. One, I’ve been so busy catching up with my DVR that I haven’t had time to sit down and create a blog entry about them. Secondly, I haven’t watched a movie since getting Direct TV. I knew this would happen, and it’s irksome. But expected. Lastly, I was so busy working two jobs I had no brain space left for real thought. Luckily for my blogging desires, I got laid off. Obviously the universe wants me to blog more.

Thanks, universe. You fucker.

I wanted to watch Sherlock Holmes in the theater. I saw a preview for it while watching some other movie (probably Harry Potter, knowing how rarely I go to the movie theater) and immediately informed TBF that we had to see it.

I’m a big Guy Ritchie fan. Unlike the majority of people I’m friends with, I enjoyed Snatch¹. I think he created sharp, funny movies with amazing visuals and fun fight scenes. So the fact that he was doing a modern Sherlock Holmes that starred Robert Downey, Jr? There is no bad here.

This movie works on so many different levels. First and foremost is the INCREDIBLE on screen chemistry between the three leads. They play off each other so beautifully, it’s unbelievable. One would think they’ve been making movies together for decades.

I’m a HUGE Robert Downey, Jr fan. He won me over with his roles in Soap and Natural Born Killers, and I’ve paid attention to all of his other movies. The man has serious talent, and he plays roles with such humor and a fun spirit. It makes sense, since he’s a recovering drug addict. All the people in that club have a certain twisted humor.

He is absolutely BRILLIANT as Sherlock Holmes. I cannot shout it loud enough how much I enjoyed his portrayal. I’m a fan of Sherlock Holmes, but I know him as the tightly held, stiff upper lippy character that I grew up knowing. This Holmes? Ohhhh, how I can get behind him. Watching him take in everything around him slowly and methodically, and use what he hears/senses. Oh, it’s just so good.

And who knew Downey was THAT ripped? WOW. And he was believably ripped. He didn’t buff himself up like Jake Gyllenhaal in Prince of Persia. I honestly believe he looks like that in real life. And I would like to do very naughty things to him looking like that in real life. Even bloody.

I have never been much of a Jude Law fan. It’s not that I don’t like him, it’s just I’ve seen so few movies of his that I can’t fawn all over him like others do. I also don’t think he’s all that attractive. My own fault, I don’t care for blondes.

But he surprised me here. The stoic nature and dry humor of Watson is portrayed beautifully. He’s mostly the straight man to Holmes, but as with most straight men roles, he gets his own great lines and scenes. He gets to slap Holmes around while simultaneously setting up his greatest jokes. He’s by far secondary to RDJ, but he most definitely holds his own against what I consider to be a superior actor.

Rachel McAdams rocked my world in Mean Girls. But I haven’t seen any other movies that she’s been in. She does a lot of chick flicks, and I’m not especially fond of those. I was willing to overlook those due to the Regina factor, and she didn’t let me down here. I’m pleased to see that the sharp wit and regal bearing she had in Mean Girls was not solely due to excellent writing. She and Holmes have so much sexual chemistry together, I would not have been surprised if reports surfaced that they were boinking like bunnies behind the scenes.

Besides the great acting team, this movie has some amazing visuals. The entire film is dark and dirty. No offense to Brits, who I love and adore, but this is always how I have visualized England. Not dirty as in unclean, just…a little gray. It’s the stereotype of the rainy, cloudy world. And as negative as that may sound, it’s part of England’s appeal for me. It’s one of the countries I’ve always wanted to go to, so it’s not a negative in my mind. And this movie kicks my desire to be there into overdrive.

There’s a lot of false visuals, but it really is appealing to the eye. The sets are incredible, and I wasn’t surprised to learn that the house used as Holmes residence was also Number 12, Grimmauld Place in Harry Potter. That added an entirely different level of fangirl love for me.

The hoyay vibe between Holmes and Watson is just absurd. I mean, really. This film may as well have been marketed as a gay love story. I adored their friendship, and giggled my way through the subtext. When Watson screams for Holmes to stay where he is because the docks are about to explode, my cold dead heartstrings sang. I’m hoping for a hot, down and dirty makeout scene in the sequel. Perhaps Watson can help him find that key.

I’m a big fan of House, which from conception was marketed as the medical version of Sherlock Holmes. I always saw the similarities in terms of the mystery aspect, but this movie had my brain spinning with the similarities between Holmes/Watson and House/Wilson. I can’t help but wonder if Guy Ritchie is a House fan.

Clever and funny, with amazing fight scenes and clever visuals. I loved this on every level. I’m looking forward to the sequel SO much.

1. Yeah, yeah, insert your own joke here, perverts. ^{^}

TV Meme Day 30: And thus we come to our end

2010-06-30T20:04:00.003-05:00

Day 30 - Saddest character death

BTVS Season 5: “Seeing Red” – Tara is shot

I don’t think there is another option. There has been no death on any show that hurt as much as this loss, including Anya in the finale and Doyle in Season 1 of Angel.

Joss cocked the Fuck With The Fans gun by including Amber Benson in the opening credits for this episode. Those of us who were stupid enough to be spoiled by this were pretty much horrified that he would do that to us, but the truth is, it’s such a Joss thing to do it’s not even funny.

After struggling through the majority of the season with Tara being a background character, there mostly to torture Crack!Magic Willow, they finally got back together! YAY! Bliss! Peace! Happiness! Relationship normality for our characters!

All episode they were lovey dovey and sweet. Fuck the censors, fuck the parent council. They kissed. They macked. There was nakedness under red sheets, normally reserved on Whedon shows for the hetero couples, finally claimed by the only normal couple we’ve had.

And then they’re clothed, and there’s belt loop tugging and yay, Buffy and Xander will make up.

“Your shirt.”

Joss has said no one cries like Alyson Hannigan, and he’s so right. Sarah Michelle Gellar is an incredible crier, as is Amy Acker. But neither one of them holds a candle to Aly. And when she sobbed over Tara’s dead body, I don’t think there was a fan who didn’t feel it in their soul.

Hands down, dollars to donuts. Best worst death ever.

If it was eligible, I would love to have said Shepherd Book from Serenity. It’s a television character, but he died in the movie, so he doesn’t get to be included. But for the dialogue between Mal and Book alone, it deserves an honorable mention.

Mal: I look to be bored by many more sermons before you slip. Just don't move.
Book: Can't order me around, boy. I'm not one of your crew.
Mal: Yes, you are.

Wash’s death was shocking and horrifying and sad, but it was fast and in the moment. This was painful, and we felt it.

This is the final TV Meme entry. In the past month, I doubled my entries. And it was SO much fun. I’m kind of sad it’s over.

Someone find me another meme!

TV Meme Day 29: Slacking again!

2010-06-29T17:18:00.005-05:00

Coming to the end of the TV meme, and I've let it slip once more. Not totally my fault. I had a flake-out on one answer, then I got a brand spankin' new computer that rocks my world and distracted me from blogging. But I'm back now! I think.
Day 27 - Best pilot episode

Angel - City Of

This is kind of cheating, because it's a pilot for a spin-off show. But with this spin-off, Joss Whedon let his Buffy fans know what they were in for. This wasn't going to be a family friendly Buffy show. This was much more adult, and a lot darker.

David Boreanaz was never better on this show than he was in Season 1, especially right at the beginning. He was still broody, and still young enough to be a hot vampire. We got to meet Doyle, World's Best Sidekick (if there were a meme entry for Best Sidekick, it would be Doyle, btdub) and incredible comic relief on the show. Sadly Glenn Quinn's real life problems caused us to lose him halfway through the season in one of the greatest character deaths we had on any of the shows.

And we had the real Cordy. The bitch who didn't really care about anything and was really only helping Angel because she wasn't making any money and she could get something from it. She and Angel weren't in love, and life was shiny.

Great start to a fantastic season. And a great show that kind of sunk deeper and deeper into not so great, but was still amazing to watch.

"So are you still...grrr?"
"There's not actually a cure for that."

Day 28 - First TV show obsession

Clarissa Explains it All

There was no bad with this show, and I watched it religiously. Clarissa was the quintessential cool teen (was she even a teen when the show started?). I related to absolutely NOTHING about her life, and I wanted to live it. I wanted an annoying little brother and a hippie mom and a dorky dad. I wanted to dress like she did (which, in reality, was tragic), I wanted a computer like hers. I wanted to live in a two-story house so that my platonic guy friend could climb a ladder to visit me.

The show also referenced pop culture. Even today, a lot of teen shows will not reference current pop culture unless there's something in it for them, such as a guest appearance by an artist who needs publicity. In the very first episode, They Might Be Giants was name dropped. When Ferguson conned his father out of money to buy an INXS tape, Clarissa busted him by putting the tape into their stereo, and "Suicide Blonde" boomed out of the speakers. It should be noted that in the Season 1 DVD, they inserted generic fake music. Someone didn't want to pay royalties.

My favorite was that they did, in fact, reference Nirvana. It's the pop culture reference I immediately go to when discussing the show.

I wrote fanfiction for this show. I will say nothing more.

Day 29 - Current TV show obsession

I don't...have...one.

I'm obssessed with the fact that Dollhouse Season 2 is coming out on DVD soon, and I can't wait. Does that count? :(

Leverage. Castle. Top Chef.

Honestly, I haven't been obsessed about a television show since Dollhouse was canceled. It makes me sad not to get bouncy pouncy excited about a show anymore. In fact, three episodes of Leverage have aired, and I haven't watched them yet. This makes me so sad. I miss being excited about television shows.

TV Meme Day 26: OMG WTF BBQ

2010-06-26T21:42:00.004-05:00

Day 26 | OMG WTF? Season finale

Mad Men, Season 1, "The Wheel"

I may be biased on this answer, because I'm currently watching the commentary for Season 3 of Mad Men.

I started watching the show because Vincent Kartheiser and Christina Hendricks were both on the show. I didn't know any of the other actors, and was prepared to fast foward past all parts that didn't involve the two.

Oh, how surprising THAT one was.

What an insanely fantastic show, from episode one on. Beautiful cast, incredible wardrobe and set design, sharp writing. I really can't say enough about the show.

I wondered if I should pick this finale, because all three of the finales so far have been jaw-dropping with edge-of-your-seat cliffhangers. But this was the original, and this was the one that really knocked me on my ass and made me long for the next season.

I don't know what's wrong with me that I didn't see Peggy was pregnant. I legitimitally did not see that she'd gained that much weight, and didn't see the warning signs. Why? I'm a dumbass. That's the only excuse I can offer.

But the two big plot lines exploded in the finale. Don's cheating was revealed, causing him to be alone at the end of the episode, with the audience not knowing the fate of the marriage. He'd discovered his brother was dead, and we got that incredibly moving scene with the Kodak Carousel.

And Peggy, who'd finally gotten recognition and a modicum of respect from Don at the office, popped out a kid. She didn't know she was pregnant, I didn't know she was pregnant, I hope OTHER people might've missed it, as well, and that I'm not just an idiot.

When the credits rolled, I squealed with indignation. And looked forward immensely to the next season. And at the end of that season, I squealed with indignation and couldn't wait for the next. And at the end of the last season?

Yeah. July 25th cannot come fast enough.

TV Meme Day 25: Coming Soon

2010-06-25T22:02:00.004-05:00

Day 25 | A show you plan on watching

Doctor Who

Unlike all of the other shows my friends are constantly foisting on me, this actually seems like a show I would legitimately enjoy. The really funny part? I know absolutely NOTHING about Doctor Who. Nothing. Nada. Zip.

I know that the very pretty man featured in the graphic is said Doctor. I know there's someone named Rose. I know that there are these weird R2-D2 looking things, which I think are called...Daleks? Or something to that affect? Possibly the R2-D2 looking things are not called Daleks (sp), but something else is.

As I said, my knowledge is extremely shaky.

But you can tell a lot about a fandom not only by the fans, but the quality of the fandom actions. And I really enjoy seeing the Dr Who fandom. Including my best friend Laura, who was absolutely horrified to learn I'd never seen it.

To be fair, I have seen one episode. The only thing I can tell you is Anthony Stewart Head played a head master of a school. Absolutely no clue about the rest of the show. Couldn't throw anything out there.

I would like to be a Dr Who fan when I grow up.

See Ry's entry for another show I'll see someday.

TV Meme Day 24: Best Quote

2010-06-24T18:24:00.003-05:00

Day 24 - Best quote

So here's the part where you make a choice. What if you could have that power, now? In every generation, one Slayer is born, because a bunch of men who died thousands of years ago made up that rule. They were powerful men. This woman is more powerful than all of them combined. So I say we change the rule. I say my power, should be *our* power. Tomorrow, Willow will use the essence of this scythe to change our destiny. From now on, every girl in the world who might be a Slayer, will be a Slayer. Every girl who could have the power, will have the power. Can stand up, will stand up. Slayers, every one of us. Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?

See RyAn's choice for what finally kicked my brain into gear on choosing the perfect quote.

Only Joss could've given us this finale. As unhappy as I was with so much of the season, and the finale itself, this was beautiful, and perfect, and I am weeping, thanks for asking.

TV Meme Day 23: Most Annoying Character

2010-06-23T17:53:00.001-05:00

Day 23 | Most annoying character

TV Meme Day 22: Let's Go to Work

2010-06-22T19:28:00.014-05:00

Day 22 - Favorite series finale

Angel - Not Fade Away (2004, episode 110)

This is not an easy question. Series finales are painful. It's the end of an era. If done properly, they drag out tears and horror and death.

Buffy does not qualify. As amazing as the "Every woman is a slayer" message was, I wasn't pleased with the way the show ended. I wish my favorite show could take the spot here, but it can't. The spin-off, however, well qualifies.

When the hour was up, and the credits rolled, I was in shock. I'd cried my way through most of it, and wasn't looking at the clock. I went outside and cried some more.

The show ended, and it managed to do what neither show had done in years. I loved every single character. That includes characters I hadn't appreciated in a very very long time.

This meme will be told through a picspam. Enjoy.

"You need to decide for yourselves if that's worth dying for."

"Your signature there will remove any opportunity that you will ever earn your once-precious humanity."

"Today, I want you guys to go out. Live. Do whatever you want."

"I'll have you know I am damn loyal, dumbass."

Angel: "People who don't care about anything will never understand the people who do."
Hamilton: "Yeah, but we won't care."

"And you wonder why folks don't vote."

"Good night, folks."

"Would you like me to lie to you now?

" I kind of want to slay the dragon."

TV Meme Day 21 - Ours is a forever love

2010-06-21T20:23:00.005-05:00

Day 21 - Favorite ship - Buffy/Angel (BTVS/Angel)

I take it I'm limited to real 'ships, right? My beloved unconventional ships don't apply here?

Bastards.

I started watching BTVS mid Season 2. Full fledged Angelus leather pants. I was immediately drawn into this star-crossed pain filled lover storyline. As I watched the season, and caught up on as many reruns as I could, I fell more and more in love with the couple.

I've heard all of the arguments. Angel's a 200+ year old pedophile, Buffy was a teenager who couldn't possibly be in love, blah blah biddy blah.

In Season 1, this argument could have worked. Buffy was extremely flakey and rather shallow. Post Prophecy Girl, this argument does not hold water. Buffy grew up SO much in the summer between Seasons 1 and 2. Not because she was a bratty hormonal teenager, but because she DIED, and fully embraced her role as the slayer. If it had been a physical change, she'd be 8 feet tall and weigh 300 pounds. For all intents and purposes, Buffy was more adult than almost all of the adults featured on this show.

Yes, Angel had been around for a very, very long time, but he was sired at, what, 17? Other than Darla, we didn't see him have real emotions for any woman other than Buffy. And you can't even include Darla in this, because it was soulless obssession and lust.

Their relationship grew and blossomed before our eyes, and then they made love, and the world went to hell. And my heart exploded with pain everytime Buffy cried over Angel, everytime Angelus did something to hurt her. And he got his soul back, and she sent him to hell. True sacrifice. The sacrifice of an adult.

Angel came back. And they attempted to stay apart. Angel showed very real, very strong remorse for what Buffy had been through. Yes, he was abusive to her when he lost his soul, but he showed 100x over how sorry he was and worked to regain her trust. Unlike some other abusive relationships Buffy was in later.

And to save her, Angel left. And the B/A world cried. And the few B/A moments we had in the next three years sustained all of us. I Will Remember You. Pangs. Forever.

I don't have the energy to look up the bullshit episode where Angel and Cordelia bumped uglies in Angel Season 4. But you know what?

He said Buffy's name. Yep, we all heard it, and we screamed with glee. We all almost came right there with him.

And in Chosen, the groundwork for hundreds of pieces of fanfiction was laid down. It didn't matter that she stupidly fucked Spike after all that happened. The cookie dough's in the oven, and the fans can be happy.

I love my Buffy/Angel more than any other conventional ship on any show.
Hey. Where'd that come from?

TV Meme Day 20: Kiss Me

2010-06-20T21:49:00.005-05:00

Day 20 - Favorite kiss

The pairing for this one was easy. It was picking between two scenes for them.

Season six was the worst season of Buffy ever. EVER. Just thinking of it gets me angry and upset. Buffy and Spike abusing each other, Xander and Anya losing all of the sweetness we'd come to love in them. Dawn's existance. Giles' nonexistance. Willow's magic crack. NO GOOD COMES FROM WATCHING SEASON SIX.

And Willow and Tara broke up, and the entire world cried. Not for Willow, mind you, because Marti Noxon worked damn hard to make me despise Willow as a girlfriend. Tara deserved a hell of a lot better than what she got in this season.

And they would meet up and there would be awkward pain that would nearly bring tears when you remembered how much this relationship had grown in two seasons.

And then Entropy. Tara and Willow went on a date, and it was sweet, and so hopeful. And the final scene, with Tara in the doorway, and the Once More With Feeling dress in the background.

Tara: "There's just so much to work through. Trust has to build again, on both sides. You have to learn if...if we're even the same people we were, if you can fit in each other's lives, it's a long and important process and...can we just skip it? Can you...can you just be kissing me now?"

I was spoiled for this part, and I still cried like a baby when Willow and Tara ran at each other and had the greatest kiss on television. When I made a group video for BTVS about the different relationships in the show to the song "White Flag" by Dido, I used this kiss for the best part of the song. It was pre-planned because this was the most important kiss.

And then in the next episode. Sigh.